Justin Bieber is sharing intimate details about the early days of his rise to stardom and how it affected his life.
In a heartfelt Instagram post on Monday, September 2, the singer discussed how jetting to superstardom at age 13 and the issues that came along with fame shaped some of his struggles with mental health and substance use once he reached adulthood.
"It's hard to get out of bed in the morning with the right attitude when you are overwhelmed with your life, your past, job, responsibilities, emotions, your family, finances, your relationships," Bieber wrote. "You start foreseeing the day through lenses of 'dread' and anticipate another bad day."
In the lengthy and candid post, Bieber revealed that an unstable home life, having access to "whatever he wanted," and having his whole world "flipped on its head" ended up contributing to some of the problems he has expressed dealing with as an adult. He expressed that the "ups and downs" of being an entertainer lead to his usage of "heavy drugs" by the age of 19 as well as pushed him to abuse "all of his relationships" as well, as he noted specifically he had been "disrespectful to women."
“I became resentful… and angry,” he wrote. “I became distant to everyone who loved me, and I was hiding behind, a shell of a person that I had become. I felt like I could never turn it around.”
Bieber discussed how he went from his life as a 13-year-old from a small town to being praised and adored by millions of fans, which eventually lead to him believing how "great" he was, which he believes was not only harmful to his personal growth, but ended up keeping him from learning the "fundamentals of responsibility." He also lamented being 18 years old with the world as his oyster and millions of dollars to do as he pleased with.
“By 20, I made every bad decision you could have thought of and went from one of the most loved and adored people in the world to the most ridiculed, judged, and hated person in the world," he wrote.
Before wrapping up his lament on his past issues, Bieber spoke on marriage, which is the "best season" of his life.
“You learn patience, trust, commitment, kindness, humility, and all of the things it looks like to be a good man," he wrote of his relationship with his wife, Hailey Bieber. He wrapped things up with a call to readers to "keep fighting," and urged fans to be kind and bold, and to love people.
This isn't the first time the singer has been open about his mental health and the measures he's taken to confront and deal with it over the years.
In February, Bieber was reportedly seeking treatment for depression, and has publicly commented on his "struggles with finding peace," often thanking Hailey for helping him through the rough patches throughout the course of their relationship.
In March, Bieber told fans he had "been struggling a lot" with feeling "super disconnected and weird" when he shared a snap of himself praying alongside Kanye West and manager Scooter Braun. He assured fans he would bounce back as he "always does," requesting that fans pray for him and crediting his faith for getting him through many of his rougher patches.