Catelynn summed up mental illness best on tonight’s episode of Teen Mom OG: “Sometimes you have your good days, and sometimes you have your bad days.” And Amber, still recovering from postpartum depression, had a bit of both during her girls’ trip (and birthday trip) to Florida with her fellow moms.

As we witnessed on tonight’s installment, Amber suffered a bout of anxiety once she, Maci, Catelynn and Cheyenne arrived in Boca Raton upon realizing people were looking their way.

“This is way too much attention. I’m not used to going out with all the cameras like that,” she said. “I just felt like the walls were closing on me… I don’t like people looking at me like that... that was my first anxiety attack for a long time.”

Later that night, the mama of two spoke about her struggles even more, specifically with Chey, who was unclear about the specifics of Amber’s bipolar disorder and borderline personality disorder diagnoses.

“I just feel anxiety all day, sad for no reason at all,” Amber began, adding that she’s on medications to help regulate her emotions. “Obviously, since the day we started this show, I’ve been f*cking nuts… beating up people, going to jail. There was something I needed in my life to help me calm down. I didn’t have any of that [medicine] back in the day and, if I did, I don’t think any of that stuff would’ve happened.”

Speaking of meds, Amber later confessed to Cate that she had stopped taking them for the trip so she could enjoy a few drinks, but she was feeling the negative effects. That could’ve partly explained why she was in a major funk the next day and didn’t want to get out of bed and join the girls on their boating excursion.

Cate, who has firsthand experience with anxiety and depression, gave Amber a “pep talk,” and she eventually got dressed, joined the other moms and had a great time.

And thankfully, the trip ended with a “good day” for Amber. Despite some rough patches, there wasn’t much to not enjoy about a beach vacay to which her boyfriend sent flowers—yup, Andrew shipped roses to the moms’ rental home to make her feel better—and during which she celebrated her birthday at a drag show with her MTV pals!

To see more of Amber’s journey, keep watching Teen Mom OG Mondays at 9/8c.