Never Board A Plane, Boat, Or Rocket With Tom Hanks

You’ve been warned

If you’re going on a trip with Tom Hanks anytime in the near future, you might want to rethink that decision immediately, because the actor’s traveling track record could not be worse. After the debut of Sully, out in theaters today (September 9), fans realized traveling with Hanks only leads to disaster and despair.

For starters, Hanks and airplanes do not mix well together. Besides being forced to land a plane on the Hudson River after losing two of its engines in Sully, Hanks was also the sole survivor of a plane crash — and was forced to survive totally alone (well, almost) on an island for four years before being rescued in Cast Away. Plus, he died in Cloud Atlas after his plane blew up.

Boats and rockets are no better. There’s the time his ship was overtaken by Somali pirates in Captain Phillips and he almost died. Or when his spaceship malfunctioned and he almost died. Fans are not having it with you and your stream of bad luck, Tom. Heck, even The Washington Post (jokingly) cautioned people who wish to travel with him.