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Indie Rock Carrie Bradshaw Is The Best Thing On Twitter This Week

I have to wonder, does this anonymous genius know how spot-on their tweets are?

Dear reader,

Walking around the Big Apple, land of dreams and street meat — take that as you will — it’s easier than ever to feel alone in a crowd. This goes double if that crowd is lined up outside whatever the current equivalent of 285 Kent or 538 Johnson is; or, as Carrie Bradshaw would put it, “located on the corner of ‘right now’ and ‘everyone was there.’”

It’s no secret that the DIY scene can sometimes feel exclusionary, even to veterans. Fitting in at a show can feel harder than getting a table at whatever bullshit restaurant Miranda Hobbes cared about in 1999. The rules of punk sometimes feel hard and fast: One must, for instance, blend in with one’s surroundings. Expectations of appearance and behavior go past live-music venues, coloring a person’s everyday life (and especially their social media presence). It’s total commitment to an aesthetic, in a lot of cases, and that aesthetic, now more than ever, is painfully low-key.

Could there ever be room for a girl in Manolos and a tutu, with nothing to show but her guitar and her dreams (and a spacious apartment that she somehow pays for as a freelance columnist, which is probably the most awe-inspiring thing about the whole show TBH)?

Enter every musician’s new favorite Twitter account, @BradshawOnTour (it’s a shame @CarrieOnTour was taken by a Carrie Underwood fan page). Whoever the anonymous genius behind this account is, they’ve mastered both Candace Bushnell’s prescriptive tone and the intricacies of a life crammed between the person who used to be your best friend before you had to smell their farts in an enclosed space cross-country for six weeks and a pile of merch in the backseat of a $3,000 minivan.

It’s a fairly new account — started on May 1, it only has 46 tweets so far, but every one is a gem. From debating whether or not it’s safe to sleep with your shit in the van to meditating on the difference between Manolos and Marshall stacks, I have to wonder: If Twitter really is a bunch of isolated users screaming about their unique experiences into a digital void, what does it mean when the void answers back? What about when the void has a great pedal board and better shoes than you? Only time — and @BradshawOnTour — will tell.

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