[caption id="attachment_204902" align="alignleft" width="300"] Getty Images[/caption]
You know him as the wonderful wizard of Oz, the guy who loves crazy smart monkeys, the one-armed hiker, a lab-coated doctor on "ER" and so many other roles on screens both big and small, but last night James Franco got a new part to play: Roastee.
Yes, El Franco himself was chosen by Comedy Central to be the subject of the channel's annual roast special, and the artiste seemed to be absolutely chill with handling the heat of those burns, which started from the very opening credits, in which every name was Franco-ized.
Roast Master Seth Rogen was on hand to dish it out, alongside comedian Nick Kroll, "This Is the End" co-star Jonah Hill, Sarah Silverman, Bill Hader, Natasha Leggero, Andy Samberg, Aziz Ansari and roast mainstay Jeffrey Ross.
Since it's so much more fun to watch someone else take the scorn of their friends and colleagues, let's relive the magic of last night's roast with the 14 best burns against James Franco, along with one surprise bonus burn he threw right back.
1. "He's tough to pin down, although I've heard many guys have been able to do it." - Seth Rogen
2. "James became famous for playing James Dean, which makes sense because they both sucked some dicks and made three good movies...you asked us to do this, man." - Seth Rogen
3. "If Franco at any point opens his eyes all the way, it means we have six more weeks of summer." - Nick Kroll
4. "He got into Yale like everyone else: He got really really famous and kinda asked a guy from Yale if he could go there. Just like everyone else." - Jonah Hill
5. "He has his own philosophy on this. One for them, five for nobody." (Franco shrugs) - Jonah Hill
6. "You are the weirdest f**king person anyone has ever met in their entire lives. I've known you for 10 years and I'm still pretty sure I've never met you before." - Jonah Hill
7. "I don't think James is necessarily gay or straight, he just literally can't open his eyes enough to see who he's f**king." - Sarah Silverman
8. "Robert DeNiro, Sean Penn, Julia Roberts. These are just some of the huge stars James has been lucky enough to work with who didn't want to be here tonight." - Sarah Silverman
9. "You have a crippling affliction known as dumbface, but you never let that interfere with your dream of making dogs**t movies and explicitly gay Gucci ads." - Bill Hader
10. "Oh, wait, that wasn't you, that was your less retarded younger brother, Dave. That sounds like a made-up brother name. Dave." - Bill Hader
11. "I'll f**k you, James, I just want to put a bag over your career choices." - Natasha Leggero
12. "Knock knock. (Who's there?) I think about you when I masturbate." - Andy Samberg
13. "James, I look forward to you coming up here and doing what you do best: Being mildly funny reading materials Seth Rogen wrote for you." - Aziz Ansari
14. "You look like Johnny Depp with lupus. Does Ryan Gosling ever call you, start laughing and then hang up?" - Jeffrey Ross
And one bonus burn...
Seth Rogen: "Look at me doing all the talking while you sit there doing nothing. I feel like I'm hosting the Oscars with you."
James Franco: "I wish."
Sorry, Anne. Ya burnt.