SAN JOSE, Calif. -- It was not your average office holiday party by any

stretch of Metallica's warped imagination.

Though the Christmas tree in the lobby was festooned with lights and the air

was filled with the sound of cheerful chatter and champagne corks popping, the

crowd of revelers gathered Thursday night at radio station KSJO in San Jose,

Calif., was not 9-to-5ers giddy on the thought of free food and drink.

Rather, the crowd included the hard-rock superstars and a few of their fine

musical friends, gathering to spread a little mischievous holiday cheer in the

form of a radio show.

For three hours that night Metallica (RealVideo excerpt) -- singer/guitarist James Hetfield, guitarist Kirk Hammett, drummer Lars Ulrich and bassist Jason Newsted -- joined gravelly voiced DJ Stephen Ferrall in taking over the

airwaves in the cramped studio, for an event appropriately dubbed "Don't Call

Us, We'll Call You." During that time, the band spun discs, called fans and

jammed with their pals, including Jerry Cantrell and Sean Kinney from Alice in

Chains, Les Claypool from Primus, rocker/crooner Chris Isaak, Blues

Traveler's harp-happy frontman John Popper, Lynyrd

Skynyrd's Gary Rossington and Corrosion of Conformity's Pepper Keenan.

The studio was a flurry of activity from the start. Take this snapshot, for

example: While Metallica played "Helpless" in the recording booth, Cantrell and

Rossington worked through the changes to "Tuesday's Gone" in the hall,

Popper swapped stories with Claypool over a beer in the kitchen and station

workers ran around flipping switches and keeping the evening technologically

afloat.

Proving that their success hasn't taken them far from their juvenile, "hey bud,

let's party!" roots, Metallica kept the mood loose, joking with the DJ and the fans

they called, belching incessantly and constantly hamming it up on their

acoustic instruments, taking stabs at Christmas tunes such as "Jingle Bells" as

well as former band member Dave Mustaine.

Looking like a devilish version of the comic-book hero Pippin with his cropped

hair and stub of a goatee, Hetfield led Metallica through the first number,

"Low Man's Lyric," off of the new album Re-Load, one of eight songs they

played that night. On "Low Man's Lyric," the band, dressed in jeans

and T-shirts, was joined by Kinney on percussion, as well as a hurdy-gurdy

player. In between songs, the band called fans from around the country who

had won contests at the 200-plus stations linked via satellite.

Most of the calls consisted of little more than a stammering "Dude, you guys are

awesome!" but a few callers took the opportunity to ask pointed questions. One

fan from Boston accused the group of selling out, to which Ulrich

deftly responded, "Yep, we're selling out all right. Everywhere we go, the

marquee reads: Metallica Tonight: Sold Out."

Another asked the band if they

would let former member Dave Mustaine back in the band now that he's sober.

(Mustaine was fired from Metallica years ago due to his substance abuse, and

later went on to form Megadeth.) Hetfield quickly responded with "Dave, is that

you? You sound different, Dave," at which the crowded room erupted in riotous

laughter.

One of the strangest pairings of the evening occurred when San Francisco

crooner Chris Isaak lent his vocals to "Nothing Else Matters," off the self-titled "Black" album. His velvety falsetto blended well with

Hetfield's gritty tones, and Hammett -- seated and strumming --

could do nothing but smile.

While fans who have been critical of the band's evolution -- including shorter

haircuts and acoustic performances -- may have seen Isaak's teaming with the

band as ultimate proof of their selling out, they are probably not taking into

account that the Bay Area music scene is nothing if not congenial. When asked

why he took part in the evening, Isaak deadpanned, "Well, I owed James

[Hetfield] $700, and he said we'd be even if I came down here tonight." He later

confided, "Actually, I've known James for years, and love the band. I just wanted

to help out."

Also on hand was Blues Traveler's Popper, whose

incendiary harmonica breathed fire into the older tune "Four Horsemen."

Despite preparing for a February leg surgery, Popper flew out from New York for

the evening. "I met these guys a couple years ago at a show in New York City,

and I just love playing with them," he said.

Even loose-hewn events such as this must have the obligatory all-star celebrity

jam. After a monstrous "Creeping Death," played by request for Los Angeles

Dodgers catcher and longtime fan Mike Piazza, who phoned in and recounted

losing his virginity after seeing Metallica in Philadelphia in 1985, the band

brought all its guests together.

Once the mics had been set up and the DJ shut up, the ensemble swayed into a

beautifully sad "Tuesday's Gone," featuring original Skynyrd member

Rossington on vocals. The room fell silent and still as the final strains of the

song rang.

After the eight-minute opus ended, hugs and high-fives abounded in the studio,

cigars were passed around and the English roadies began offering up their own

batch of Three Stooges-esque physical humor while packing up. Metallica gave

one last song to the fans, a rollicking "Last Caress," which had everyone

bobbing their heads up and down in lieu of pogoing.

The song ended, the band got up, smiling, and cleared the room, arm in arm

with their friends. Group photos followed. Amid the empty bottles and cords in

the studio lay a blow-up sheep doll, which at some point in the evening had

been brutally accosted, and now had a prong foisting out of its rectum.

No, this was definitely not your average office holiday party. [Mon., Dec. 22, 1997, 9:00 a.m.

PST]