Ready to feel old? OK, well how about it's been almost 20 (tweeeentyyyy!) years since "The Craft" came along and lent a little Friday night frights fun to your seventh grade slumber party tradition. Yep. The flick hit theaters May 3, 1996.
Back in '96 "The Craft" was one of the gotta-hit-Blockbuster (another relic of Generation X) gems for the Tiger Beat era -- see also: "Scream" and "Romeo + Juliet" -- and looking back at it, it's not hard to see why. The movie was flat out freaky. And even now it still holds up because man alive those girls were BRUTAL.
Seriously, no disrespect to our buds from Hogwarts and all, because we love them more than words, obvs, but these witches of the west (well, California) were sublimely wicked. They were the essentially the pre-"Mean Girls" mean girls. And, let's be honest. Regina George would have nothing on Nancy Downs (Fairuza Balk).
Nancy'd take the concept of a Burn Book to a whole new, more literal level. And if she wanted to, she would have definitely made fetch happen. As in, somebody would be fetching her something, whether they wanted to or not.
Frankly, there are very few cinematic spellcasters whose powers have stuck with us as much as these girls and here are a few reasons why.
First of all, they totally invented the notion of practical magic.
Why bother with chemical processing and style products and fussing with a straightening iron when you can literally run your fingers through it and go? We're still scouring our grimoires for the secret to this trick.
And they played the raddest group games ever.
You know you tried "Light as a Feather, Stiff as a Board" with your friends after this scene. And you secretly hoped it'd work, too. It's okay to admit it.
They could even insta-Mystique themselves into another person if they wanted to.
No Polyjuice Potion necessary, thank you very much.
And they gave exactly zero effs what everyone else thought about them.
Hey, if you're gonna be a pack of outsiders, own it, is all we're saying.
These chicks were straight up proud of their strange status.
Why pretend? JUST LET IT BE KNOWN.
And the style? Come on.
Goth chic and punk pixie cuts were all the fashion passion after this flick. And rightfully so with all this ferocity on tap.
And they really honed in on that whole "payback is a you-know-what" concept.Sony Pictures Entertainment
Even though Laura Lizzie (Christine Taylor) was snooty as all get-out, and she most definitely deserved to be taken down a peg or two or three, she got more than her hair share of comeuppance when she crossed the likes of this spellcasting quartet.
Loyalty was a major, MAJOR must-have for them.
There is no "I" in occult, people.
Meanwhile, sanity was totally optional.
Freak flags were just made to be flown, right?
Which meant when things got ugly, they got oooooooooogly.
Three against one? No such thing as a fair fight with this much spite.
There were some serious casualties when these girls broke bad.
After nearly two decades, we're going to assume no spoiler alert is necessary here, so R.I.P. random vagrant burglar guy, drunky stepdad and the way too frisky football captain Chris Hooker (Skeet Ulrich).
But having natural power was, like, a BFD.
Sure, Sarah (Robin Tunney) was no Glenda the Good Witch by any means -- 'cause HELLO, who actually uses a love spell on some d-bag from the popular crew -- but she was certainly the lesser of two evils when it came to her and Crazy Pants Nancy. Plus, she was born with all her skillz on tap, so she had a distinct advantage over her deity-invoking sisters.
Like teaching them a hard lesson about their malfeasance.
What goes around comes around ... and around and around some more.
And, well, letting some of them have a gulp of their own medicine.
Nancy fought dirty when she brought out all kinds of messy mindtricks on her former bestie - snakes and bugs and blood, oh my! - but it all came full circle when her own antics landed her in a straightjacket getting medicated while she ranted about Manon giving her the power. Yikes. Done and done.
See? The best. Now, excuse us while we run off and pester Netflix some more to queue it up for streaming already, geesh.