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Lady Gaga Keeps Getting (Re)born This Way: Here's 6 More Career Paths She Needs To Take

You know, aside from my best friend.

Lady Gaga is growing up. Fast. At only 28 years old, Mother Monster has effortlessly achieved a career arc that many an octogenarian crooner would envy: from risque pop star to experimental artist to grand dame of jazz. And, after last night's show-stopping performance at the the 87th Annual Academy Awards, we couldn't help but wonder: What's next for Gaga? How many more times will she bust out as a completely different -- yet just as lovely -- butterfly?

Gaga's career has certainly been stunning thus far in its range. After building up a solid fan base with albums like The Fame and Born This Way, she took a chance with the more experimental ARTPOP, a record that didn't achieve quite the commercial or critical success that her first two efforts grabbed. Instead of putting out a flashy pop followup in an effort to "save" her career, however, Gaga decided to stray even further from the norm. A throwback jazz collaboration with Tony Bennett? Yeah, we were kind of dubious when we heard about that, too.

Surprisingly -- or maybe not so surprisingly -- Gaga managed to pull off the impossible. She made jazz palatable to a whole new audience, and even grabbed more fans in the process (including this reporter's dad). Yup, Gaga reinvented herself once more with Cheek to Cheek, becoming an iteration of Stefani Joanne Angelina Germanotta that steps out in demure gowns and steals the damn show at one of the more solemn awards ceremonies of the year.

So as Gaga successfully enters her next career stage, we'd like to offer a few humble suggestions for what she should do next -- you know, in case she doesn't have anything spectacular currently planned:

  1. Star In A Broadway Musical

    It's high time Lady Gaga return to her theatrical roots and hit the Big White Way -- hard. However, we're not talking about making a starring turn in "Chicago" or "Cats" or whatever -- we're talking about taking the stage with her own original musical. You know, like Carole King. Or Green Day. ARTPOP the musical with sets by Jeff Koons, anyone? It just makes sense.

  2. Also In A Big Hollywood Film

    Sure, Mother Monster has appeared in some flicks -- but it's time for her to go the full Cher, the full Bette Midler. It's time for Gaga to shine in her version of "Mermaids" -- or "Hocus Pocus." Maybe next time she hits up the Oscars she can do so as a nominee? It could happen.

  3. Score A Movie

    Yup. Score. We're not talking curate the soundtrack, ala Lorde and "Hunger Games." We're saying Gaga should go all Trent Reznor and set the mood of a flick. We imagine she'd go heavy on the strings and creepy kid choruses.

  4. Direct

    Music videos, movies, traffic -- it's time for Gaga to take the reins and just be the absolute boss of everything.

  5. Start Her Own Label

    Born This Way, the label? Gaga already does so much to foster the well-being of her Little Monsters -- maybe now it's time to foster a whole new generation of Mother Monsters?

  6. Go Into Veritable Isolation For 10 Years And Emerge With A Groundbreaking New Record

    I mean, this can come a little later, obviously, but eventually Gaga is going to have to pull a Bowie and disappear for a while. Recharge her batteries and be reborn. Again. And again. And again.