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Chrissy Teigen's New Esquire Photo Shoot Is Here, And Holy S--t

John Legend, you are one lucky dude.

After watching Chrissy Teigen successfully pull off a drunken first pitch at the Dodgers game on Monday -- as only a supermodel could get away with -- we’ve been wondering what she'd do next. Lucky for us, the wait wasn't long. The lovely and hilarious model (and MTV "Snack-Off" star) posted a pic from her latest photo shoot with Esquire on Instagram today, and it definitely won't disappoint her fans:

Related: Chrissy Teigen Is ‘Pretty Drunk’ For Her Dodgers First Pitch: A Twitter Play-By-Play

Besides revealing a lot of her, um, assets during the shoot, Chrissy also showed off her totally real side by sharing a ton of random, fascinating thoughts with the magazine on every subject under the sun...

On fast food: "If I'm going to eat fast food, I'm going to McDonald's."

On her butt: "I have a little half-Asian butt, and the more I work out, the more I try to get it bigger, it's just going to get flatter and harder."

On her IRL persona: "I'm much nicer in person than on Twitter."

On being a dog person: "People love to say, 'My cat is great. He's just like a dog.' I always think, Well, get a f--king dog!"

On the beach: "Sand is disgusting. I get all Larry David at the beach and want every piece of sand off me."

Check out the rest of Chrissy’s photo shoot for Esquire -- who knew mowing the lawn could be so sexy?

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