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Ryan Murphy Confesses Glee’s Big Behind-The-Scenes Mistake

"It was the best and worst time in my life"

Before helming American Horror Story and Scream Queens, Ryan Murphy struck gold by co-creating Glee with Brad Falchuk and Ian Brennan. The first season, which premiered way back in 2009, skyrocketed its cast — Lea Michele, Cory Monteith, Darren Criss, Naya Rivera, and more — to household-name status, and the New Directions choir group suddenly found themselves in the center of the spotlight.

"It was a magical experience because we shot the first 13 episodes in a bubble because nothing had aired,” Murphy recently told Entertainment Weekly. Then fame came knocking, and things got complicated.

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"It was the best time in my life and the worst time in my life," Murphy continued. "There was a lot of infighting. There was a lot of people sleeping together and breaking up. It was good training for being a parent, I’ll tell you that much."

He didn't spill on who was getting cozy with whom, so Gleeks can let their fan fictions run wild with whatever ships they please. To get your creative juices flowing, please enjoy this hilariously photoshopped GIF of Murphy.

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But still, hooking up wasn't the biggest problem on set.

"I also made a mistake: We all got too personal," Murphy revealed. "We loved it so much that we would all go out to dinner and we’d hang out and we were always together, so there was no delineation between who was the boss and who was the employee. And we were all so close that finally when something would happen, it would be so personal to me that I would literally hit the roof."

However, that closeness did help when Monteith unexpectedly died three years ago from a drug overdose. Murphy was no stranger to his addiction and rehab struggles.

"We hugged, and the last thing he said was ‘I love you, man, and thank you for helping me get better.’ And then the next thing I knew he was dead. It was like losing a child."

The Glee family supported each other through their grief, and though the show took a more somber turn, it stayed true to its roots — a "celebration of love and acceptance." Now, that's something every Gleek can get behind.