If nautical nonsense be something you wish for your last few weeks of college, Mr. Krabs from Nickelodeon's SpongeBob SquarePants is here for you. He gets it. You want to have fun, but you also want to pass your classes and graduate and get a job and move to a new city and make new friends and learn how to cook and get eight hours of sleep and party till dawn and -- whew. That's an overwhelming bucket list.
Mr. Krabs is well known around Bikini Bottom, but over the past month, his fame spread to every corner of the Internet thanks to a very blurry meme first tweeted by @isthatahmed. Now Krabs's impact is reaching your college campus. Here's what second-semester Krabs looks like:
When you're broke but can't go to the dining hall
Seniors are too ~cool~ to frequent the dining hall anymore, so they have to get their money's worth at Chipotle until they land a post-grad job.
When it's syllabus week and you haven't bought the textbook
By senior year, you know that required textbooks are actually optional. There's no point dropping $150 on a book you're going to read one chapter of. Still, when you see all those underclassmen cracking open their books, you question your decision.
When you're in a class full of freshmen
Where are all the people you know?!
When you're in a class full of seniors
Everyone is equally screwed.
When you have zero motivation to get out of bed
You're wide awake and ready to party at night, though!
When it's time to move on from college flings
Swipe at your own peril.
When it's senior week
Turn down for nothing, ever. Always turn up.
When you skip class just because you can
When you think you failed
This fear never completely goes away, no matter how old you are. Once you're in the big, bad working world, it's called Imposter Syndrome.
When your college has its annual spring concert
[unst unst unst]
When four years's worth of listservs takes over your inboxes
You signed up for the debate club on a whim during freshmen orientation, and they haven't stopped emailing you since.
When you doze off after a long night of "studying"
You went to the
barlibrary to take some shotsread some books, duh.
When you wish you lived off campus
Why god, WHY?!
When your friends are suddenly all in serious relationships
No, you can't list third-wheeling as a skill on your resume.
When it's Halloween and you're basically naked
You question if you're too old for this.
When you find out you need to stay an extra semester
Curse you, general education requirements.
When you have no idea WTF you want to do with your life
Here's a secret: We're all just winging it. You'll figure things out eventually. Worry not!