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Hollywood has often been described as "The Dream Factory," but when it comes to animated movies cartoonists can fudge the line between a dream romantic coupling and a laughable OkCupid date gone wrong.
Be it chunky monkey Ray Winstone sexing up Angelina Jolie in "Beowulf" or Meryl Streep winding up Mrs. George Clooney in "The Fantastic Mr. Fox" (which even she admitted was hilarious), there are many examples of said pairings — and here are ten more for you to fantasize about.
1. Ray Romano and Queen Latifah, "Ice Age: The Meltdown" (2006)
With her sassy boisterousness and his whiney timidity, Latifah and Romano are a match made in … well, somewhere. Their portrayal of wooly mammoths Manny and Ellie in the last three "Ice Age" movies produced not only brilliant chemistry but also a cartoon daughter, Peaches. Whether that vocal chemistry could translate to live-action success remains to be seen … "Bringing Down the House 2: Back In Da Houz," anyone?
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2. Cameron Diaz and Mike Myers, "Shrek" (2001)
"Austin Powers"/"Wayne's World" comedy giant Myers is a man of many talents, but chick magnet may not be one of them. It's ironic then that his cantankerous title ogre is actually a million times homlier than Mike is in real life, yet still manages to bag bodacious babe Diaz in the form of equally hot Princess Fiona. The decision to keep her ogre-tastic in all three sequels helped even the playing field a little.
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3. Woody Allen and Sharon Stone, "Antz" (1998)
Though Allen is now 76, even back in '98 he seemed that old, which made his pairing with the "Basic Instinct" stunner that much more perplexing. Truth be told, the Woodman actually cast Stone in her screen debut for a cameo in his own "Stardust Memories" and later chopped her into pieces when she played his cheating wife in "Picking Up The Pieces." Now there's a kids' movie for ya.
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4. Helena Bonham Carter and Peter Sallis, "Wallace & Gromit: The Curse of the Were-Rabbit" (2005)
Only in the wild and wooly world of animation could British temptress Carter (age 46) be paired off with a genuine nonagenarian in the person of "Last of the Summer Wine" veteran Sallis (age 91). Up until this film, Wallace had shown more fondness for cheese and his mute dog companion than the fairer sex, but Lady Campanula Tottington proved a perfect match with her bright red lips and hair like a big orange cheese puff.
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5. Larry the Cable Guy and Emily Mortimer, "Cars 2" (2011)
Here’s an idea: let's take one of cinema’' most elegant English roses and pair her with the redneck comedian who says "Git-R-Done!" a lot. Genius! By pairing his 1950s tow truck Mater with her sleek Jaguar XJR-15 with the Bond-ian name Holley Shiftwell, director/Pixar impresario John Lasseter made it work ... but we don't imagine "Larry the Cable Guy: Health Inspector: Secret Agent – The Movie" would have generated similar enthusiasm.
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6. Amy Poehler and Jesse McCartney, "Alvin and the Chipmunks: The Squeakquel" (2009)
Poehler is one of our funniest women, a UCB founder and SNL vet, but only in the guise of a computer animated chipmunk could we ever see her dating Teen People/Tiger Beat cover boy McCartney. They both sing their way into each other's hearts as the rather presidentially named Theodore and Eleanor, but they should let any calls for an onscreen make-out session squeak by.
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7. John Hodgman and Teri Hatcher, "Coraline" (2009)
"Desperate Housewives" hottie Hatcher has shared the screen with many a stud, but none more studlier than chubby, bookish John Hodgman, also known as "That guy who plays the PC in the Mac commercials." They voice the title protagonist's mom and dad, later doing a full reversal when Hatcher is transformed into a spidery witch. We don't forsee them being onscreen paramours anytime soon, but expect Hodgman to write a brilliant essay speculating on the idea.
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8. Robin Williams and Sofía Vergara, "Happy Feet Two" (2011)
Motormouthed comedy legend Williams has been an in-demand voice artist since he let the genie out of the bottle in "Aladdin," and even though we love it when he does his mildly un-PC Latino-voiced Ramon in the "Happy Feet" films, we were happier they cast an actual Colombian, Vergara, as his penguin mate Carmen. As for the prospect of the "Modern Family" star and the "Good Will Hunting" Oscar-winner appearing together in the flesh, stranger things have happened.
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9. Kevin Kline and Rosie Perez, "The Road To El Dorado" (2000)
We love us some Rosie Perez, but it's really hard to even think about the "Do The Right Thing" actress without hearing her exclaim "MOOKIE!" in our heads. Having her share an animated fling with erudite, Juilliard-trained Kline in this Rudyard Kipling/Hope and Crosby-esque box office turkey was inspired, but we really want to see some movie where he plays a stuffy college professor and she plays someone loud and obnoxious. Now THAT would be gold.
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10. David Schwimmer and Jada Pinkett Smith, "Madagascar 3: Europe's Most Wanted" (2012)
If there's one actor in Hollywood Will Smith need not worry about getting jiggy with his lady Jada on a movie set, it's the droopy, neurotic Schwimmer. Though their interspecies giraffe/hippo coupling in the Madagascar series is adorkable, in real life we don't see them being more than … friends. See what we did there?
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