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How Wonder Woman Stole Batman V Superman Away From The Broody Boys

The dawn of Wonder Woman

It's hard to explain how I feel about Batman V Superman: Dawn of Justice. I didn't hate it (shocking, I know) -- but I also didn't love it. Though most of the film was an arduous slog through the mud, there were moments, though few and far between, that I found quite thrilling. For the most part those kinetic scenes all had one thing in common: Wonder Woman.

Gal Gadot's Wonder Woman made her debut early on in the film, and managed to steal every scene she was in from her brooding onscreen counterparts. While they were fighting over whose dick was bigger justice or whatever, Wonder Woman was doing work -- and having a good time doing it. She's the only person in this movie who had any semblance of fun while superheroing, as evidenced by her sly grin amidst her fight with Doomsday. That grin alone is worth the $14 price of admission. She is a warrior who loves the thrill of battle. She is in her zone in this fight.

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Superman can fly! He has superhuman strength, x-ray vision, and heat vision! That's dope. Meanwhile, Bats can build almost any gadget with his Scrooge McDuck money. That's pretty effing cool! So why don't these characters act like they have awesome powers and abilities? Why are they so burdened by their existence all of the time? It's a real bummer to watch two grown men brood for 153 minutes. (The only time Batfleck showed a spark of personality was towards the end of the film, when he told Clark Kent's mother Martha, "I'm a friend of your son's." Now that's funny!)

That's why we need heroes like Wonder Woman. Batman is too overworked and depressed to ever feel joy, while Superman is too blinded by his love for Lois to see how his actions recklessly endanger the lives of innocent people. Wonder Woman, however, is a breath of fresh air. She's here to save Supes and Bats from themselves -- and save us from the drudgery of listening to them.

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Gal Gadot (left) as Wonder Woman (right).

Aside from the popular '70s television series starring Lynda Carter as Princess Diana of Themyscira, we've seen nary a Wonder Woman adaptation on our screens. In fact, Gadot's Wonder Woman is the first film adaptation of the character ever. Mind you, Wonder Woman is 75 years old. We've had to watch poor Thomas and Martha Wayne get brutally murdered 1,823 times in Dolby Digital, but it's taken more than seven decades to see Wonder Woman on the big screen? Smh.

For comparison, at this point Superman has seven individual films to his name, while Batman has eight. So it's not exactly hard to see why people are pumped to see Wonder Woman kicking ass alongside Batman and Superman. Not only does her outing in Batman V Superman set the stage for her 2017 solo film, but the success of that movie will set a precedent for future studio decisions about female-driven superhero features. For that reason alone, her presence in the film is pivotal, especially when the egregious lack of female-led superhero narratives can be summed up in one pointed line of dialogue between Bruce and Diana: "I don’t think you’ve ever known a woman like me." Perhaps not. But we need to see more.

Of course it helps that Gadot naturally commands attention; she steals every scene she's in. Not to mention, she looks cool as hell doing it. After all, Wonder Woman is of divine origins, so she's been blessed by the gods with her armor and abilities. She also has a ridiculously badass theme song from composer Hans Zimmer:

So, if you must see Batman V Superman: Dawn of Justice in theaters, see it for Wonder Woman.