Big Brother 10's Ollie and April had sex by the first week. My first thought was, it must be uncomfortably warm under those blankets. My second thought: ew.

Ever since Big Brother's first U.S. season in 2000 the anticipation of a housemate hookup has hung over the show like a horny ghost. It's why producers cast single, under-30 hotties. And it's why, besides the opportunity for spectacular fights, they ply the group with liquor.

But from the first blanket-covered hookup with season two's Dr. Will and Shannon (actually, half a hookup, since the doctor's attention wasn't reciprocated), one thing has become evident: Watching these people rut under the covers isn't so much titillating as it is, well, awkward.

It's like walking in on your college roommate and her boyfriend. We don't want access to that intimacy; we want it to stay hidden so we can pretend it doesn't exist. Then we can share a beer or watch a movie without a flashback of, say, Ollie's white socks and April's tattooed ankle, which was curiously facing downward. What Kama Sutra position was that? Again with the mental picture. See?

Conscientious viewers have captured and posted nearly every sexual encounter from Big Brother's 10 seasons. There was Amanda and David from season four, labeled the series's first full-out hookup if you don't count Shannon and Will.

There was possibly season five's Drew and Diane -- the did-they-or-didn't-they footage has been dissected and analyzed with an almost academic rigor. And the also-maybe hookup between Danielle and Nick in season eight (see "academic rigor" above).

But those seasons were quaintly Victorian compared to the ho-a-thon that was season nine. In the first week, we saw Natalie servicing Masshole Matt, who later bragged about it to the other guys. Then real-life couple Jen and Ryan did it in the bathroom. And Chelsia and gay porn-star James got busy more than once, according to Internet live-feed watchers. No video of them ever turned up.

Even season nine's excesses are tame compared to other Big Brothers around the world, where couples don't even bother with the modesty blanket.

With the culture awash in sexual imagery, you'd think that a little Big Brother action wouldn't be so uncomfortable to watch. But the people in movies and advertisements are largely abstractions. The people living in the Big Brother house are like people we actually know -- our co-workers, our relatives, our friends, and this season, even our grandparents.

With 24/7 access through the internet, we learn to recognize their motivations, their insecurities, the psychological subtext that informs their behavior.

When we watched Natalie's desperate attention-seeking last season, whether it was handing out sexual favors to Matt or giving a lap dance to Chelsia, we didn't think she was hot. We thought, this poor girl had an awful childhood and she's using her sexuality to get some validation.

And then there are just basic social boundaries. If the people in the Big Brother house are a virtual extension of people we'd know in real life, there are lines neither side is supposed to cross. We wouldn't barge into a friend's bathroom while she was on the toilet. And we certainly wouldn't want her to see us in our most intimate and emotionally vulnerable moments.

Or doing it with socks on.

Shirleen Holt is a freelance writer and former newspaper editor living outside of Portland, Ore. She has seen every episode of Big Brother.

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