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All Of The Awful Things That Might Happen If Trump Becomes President

The world might end!

After South Carolina and Nevada, many Americans might finally transition from pointing a finger at Donald Trump and laughing to realizing that the darkest timeline may exist, and there is a scenario in which he could win the nomination. This possibility has slowly been sinking in among those who obsessively track the election’s vitals. Many of those who predicted that Trump would have vanished from the race by now, his only solace the tens of thousands of hearts generated by his thoughts on Twitter, are currently imagining what it would be like if the next unthinkable event happens.

Some — garden-variety concerned citizens and those worried about what this means for the Republican Party alike — aren’t taking it too well.

What if Trump wins South Carolina? What if he wins the nomination? What if next year, the man who once sold the 5-star gourmet greatest steaks ever is now raising the stakes during his inaugural address? What if, after winning, he nominates himself for the Supreme Court and co–Vice Presidents Ted Cruz and Sarah Palin take over? What if he has the idea to turn the big, beautiful wall into a government-owned, border-spanning hotel and golf course? What if he accidentally starts a war by tweeting something about North Korea?

The wealth of hypotheticals allowed by Trump’s candidacy — when your platform is reduced to winning and making America great, there are many ways to interpret it — has turned predictions about our political future into a ready-made anthology of scary stories.

Here are a few of the worst-case scenarios that could happen if Trump were nominated or elected, according to elected officials, pundits, celebrities, and people already buying tickets to Canada. Some of these predictions seem unlikely — on the other hand, nearly every single prediction about Trump’s candidacy has been wrong, so maybe the world will end if Trump wins.

If Trump wins the nomination...

— "We will get slaughtered in November 2016."

— "He might just get around to you, and you better hope that's there someone left to help you."

— "Hillary Clinton will beat him like a drum. Just tear him up. I mean, it will be ugly to watch."

— "The GOP will lose the White House and the Senate, and its majority in the House will fall dramatically."

— "There might not be a conservative party in 2020 either."

— "I would probably go find a deserted island."

— "38% of likely voters would be scared."

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If Trump wins the presidency...

— "That will be the end of the world."

— "God help this country."

— "In a word, chaos. In two, expensive chaos."

— "The first season of The Apprentice: White House Edition will air on CBS this fall. Contestants, including Gary Busey, Ted Cruz and Kanye West, will vie for Cabinet positions."

— "One in four federal workers would consider leaving their jobs."

— "A third of Americans, mostly Democrats, specifically say there is ‘nothing’ they see as the best thing about a Trump presidency, while another 10& have no opinion."

— "Fifty percent of American voters would feel embarrassed."

— "He'd face unprecedented and implacable opposition from the Democratic Party, which might be tempted to pilfer from the playbook of the pre-2015 Republicans and become the anti-governing party."

— "We should amend the Constitution to change the two-term limit to ‘canceling’ the presidency. ... Gallup and Nielsen can make a deal on what point the Trump presidency gets canceled. And trust me, it'll be real popular on re-runs."

— "Four years of this bully will lead to civil war or worst."

— "A pig will fly out of my butthole."

— "The United States would become a hermit economy, and I have to imagine that every major American firm would decamp to literally any other country than this one."

— "It could very well lead to national catastrophe."

— "We’re liable to wake up one morning and Donald, if he were president, would have nuked Denmark."

— "The Second Amendment will be written out of the Constitution."

— "Can you imagine what would happen in the act of trying to deport 12 million human beings, if people start resisting?"

— "if you hate the government now, you'll hate it just as much under Trump. It will be doing all the same things."

— "Sorry, I threw up in my mouth there a little bit."

— "I’m moving to a farm."

— "Might I suggest moving to Cape Breton Island!"