Say what you want about tattoos: even if you love them (like I do), they hurt to get and are pretty much permanent unless you decide you want to hurt even more and get them removed. That's why deciding what to get drawn on your body ~for life~ is a big decision.
Getting a tattoo isn't for the faint of heart. Getting a mystery tattoo? That's a whole 'nother thing altogether.
From Nov. 12 to Nov. 15, you could walk into Milk Gallery in NYC and get inked by tattoo artist Scott Campbell. Campbell has tattooed such famous names as Sting, Marc Jacobs and Orlando Bloom, and on those three days, 25 lucky participants chosen at random could get a famed and usually pretty pricy tattoo by Campbell for free.
There was a catch, though: they had to stick their arm through a hole with Campbell sitting on the other side and they had no say whatsoever in their final tattoo. That's right. ? No. ? Say. ? Whatsoever. ?
Therefore, I have some questions for these 25 brave souls.
You had to be scared, right? You're definitely brave AF, do you agree? 'Cause like, what if he tattooed "Hail Satan" on your arm or something? I know he didn't, but you admit, that was a possibility, right? I mean, anything is a possibility when you have no say on what someone is going to just draw on your body for ~lyfe~, right? If you were the first one to get tattooed, did you have NO idea what was about to happen? What if it was all a trick and at the end, Ashton Kutcher came out and said you were Punk'd? I guess he would only do that if you were Jennifer Lawrence or something, right? I don't think Kutcher really pranks the non-famed, right? Or do you think he runs elaborate tricks on his cleaning staff? If he does, I bet he has pretty high employee turnover, right? If you're famous, did your publicist freak out over the fact that you now have a random tattoo on your body that you didn't have yesterday? Or are tattoos like rings, and that would get you some pretty good press? Do you think the artist, Campbell, thought of other ways to keep the mystery alive? You know, other than a hole? Or maybe giving you a glass of sleep-inducing chamomile tea? Then he could have called his show "Mystery Tea-too," but that's definitely a worse name than "Whole Glory," huh? Do you know what the name he chose is referring to? If you don't, could you not Google that? Can I ask you a question about the above image? This is, in theory, an art exhibit, right? Didn't the audience get bored watching you sit there, wincing in pain for an hour or whatever? Or was it like when you're in a museum and you look at a painting by Peter Paul Reubens and you're like, "Mmm, culture." And then you leave the art-watching to get some food? Does art-watching make you hungry too? Must be all that walking, huh? I know, freedom and truth and love and "You only live once!" and all that, but like ... OMG why? I mean, do you really like it? But, what if you didn't like it? Would you have reacted like a bridesmaid does when the bride chooses a truly awful dress for the party to wear? You know, say, "Oh my god, I LOVE IT!" and then go home and try to figure out how to alter 45 layers of acid orange tulle into a serviceable go-out dress after the wedding is over? Did you know Josh Hartnett has one of Campbell's tattoos, too? He's great in "Penny Dreadful," isn't he? How do you feel about Scott Campbell saying, "I’m opening a studio in L.A. in the springtime ... maybe it’ll just be a hole! Maybe my studio will just be a hole."? Do you think that's insanity or a pretty cool idea? Should it also be called "Whole Glory" or something else? Do you like any of these suggestions: "Eye of the Needle," "Whole Enchilada" (He could serve delicious meals, too) or "Hole-y Crap My Arm's in a Hole Getting Tattooed"? WELL do you have any suggestions? I'm only asking because that one is pretty awesome. ?
To see all the tattoos Scott Campbell inked at Milk Gallery, check out his Instagram.
