PhotoAlto/Corinne Malet

Is Your BFF’s Brother Off-Limits For A Hookup? Here’s A Checklist

He's perfect. She's your friend. What's a girl to do?

He’s hot, he's smart, he’s cool and unfortunately, he’s kind of off-limits because he’s your BFF’s bro. But how much is "kind of"?

Having a bestie with a hot brother can be a blessing and a curse. Sure, it’s nice to enjoy a little eye candy every time you pick your girl up to go to the mall, but crushing on her sibling can be a special brand of torture. If your lust for your friend’s bro has hit a fever pitch and you’re about to make those thoughts you’ve been having a reality, you should probably think through these important points first:

  • Is this something you see turning into a relationship?

    Do you respect and value him as someone whom you’d actually want as a romantic partner, or are you just drooling over his buff bod? Hooking up with a good friend’s brother is almost inevitably going to mean some drama as she tries not to be grossed out by the thought of you two sucking face. Is the potential relationship really worth that, or is the attraction simply physical? If it’s the latter, find a different cutie to crush on.

  • Have you mentioned your crush to your bestie? How did she react?

    If your friend seemed genuinely hurt or upset by the idea of you two dating, know that getting it on with him anyway may very well lead to a world of weirdness with her. If, on the other hand, she joked about it or just teased you, maybe she’d cope with it more easily than you think.

  • Are you capable of keeping PDA to a minimum?

    Absolutely no one wants to see their family member get touchy feely. Throw in the fact that you are practically family to her, and her gross-out factor is bound to multiply. If you do get involved with her bro, can you realistically avoid holding hands and kissing right in front of her? If the answer is no, perhaps you should save your affectionate ways for someone your bestie hasn’t known since infancy.

  • Do you have time to hang out separately with each of them?

    Part of the reason you may have developed a little crush on her big brother is that you see him so often when you hang out with her. This type of two-for-one hangout isn’t going to fly if you end up involved with bro-ski. Your friend will be rightfully offended if she feels like every time you come over, it’s just to see her brother.

  • Are you the type of person who can be chill after a relationship ends?

    Not “do you wish you were that type of person.” Are you that type of person? Are you friends with your exes? Do you typically have peaceful breakups? If not, you may want to seriously consider avoiding this scenario. If things get too heated, you’ll be putting your bestie into the position of taking sides, and putting yourself in the position of having to avoid your best friend’s family forever.