Welp, America, it looks like we can finally settle the age-old debate as to which half of our majestic country is truly superior. Do you know why? Because BEYONCÉ AND JAY Z ARE COMING TO CALIFORNIA, Y'ALL!
The Carters were all "no" to the blizzard situation happening in New York right now, because they’re leaving the concrete jungle in the dust and venturing out to a sunnier coast. A coast where I and my fellow Angelenos will be parading through the streets in celebration.
TMZ reports that the duo have already enrolled Blue Ivy in a fancy, $15,000/year private school. Although the school usually only accepts new students for the fall, Blue was admitted halfway through the year because that's what happens when you're the 3-year-old Heir to the Throne.
Bey and Jay are reportedly living in a hotel in Beverly Hills while they continue house-hunting on the westside.
In December, the Carters’ California dreams were temporarily squashed when they lost out on the candy-licious Beverly Hills mansion they had been eyeing.
But they just couldn't resist L.A.’s magical charms, which is totally understandable. After all, a wise philosopher (a.k.a., 2Pac) once noted that California knows how to party. Plus, science says that there is a considerably higher level of “bounce” in California than all y’all combined. Perhaps most important, it's undeniably true that California gurls are undeniable. They’re fine AND fresh AND fierce, and they’ve got it on lock.
So, welcome to L.A., Beyoncé and Jay Z. I promise our city will provide you with an actually decent NBA team (Clippers, AYYY), as many avocados as your hearts desire and enough sun to wipe away that Empire state of mind forever.