It’s a special time in every girl’s life when she first experiences romantic feelings towards one or more of the Ninja Turtles. (Or am I just speaking for myself here?) It’s an even more special time in a grown woman’s life when she realizes that’s not even the creepiest thing about herself.
Well, you should know that these Turtle-related urges -- if you happened to go through a similar phase -- were totally, totally normal. You were subconsciously figuring out what you’re into, and it’s not necessarily buff mutant turtles. They just represent the types of guys you'll end up dating. And your Ninja Turtle of choice can tell you about your ideal type of (human) dude.
Raphael: The Bad Boy
Raph is your typical lone wolf from the wrong side of the sewer. He bucks authority -- which makes him kind of a babe -- and you're drawn to him because he's intense, emotional and a seemingly fun project. It doesn't hurt that he also really knows how to fill out a trench coat.
That novelty wears off quickly and you'll get tired of being a good, understanding listener to someone who claims to be so misunderstood. If not, he'll probably cut things off before you get too close anyways. Plus, he's got tons of daddy issues, partially stemming from the fact that his adoptive father is a literal rat.
Leonardo: The Boss
It's hot in the bedroom, but insufferable pretty much everywhere else. Leo is ambitious, accomplished and impressive on paper, but that piece of paper isn't constantly bossing you around.
He can be a catch if he listens -- and grows as a person -- when you call out his controlling behavior. You both should get to be the boss!
Donatello: The Nerd
Donnie is aloof to such a degree that it seems as if he's playing hard to get. You'd think he would be psyched when girls talk to a mega nerd like him, but he's just as happy to write code. Painfully analytical, you have to check your emotions with him because he'll crush them like a robot.
But if you can deal with that, he's basically the guy you ignored in high school who's now a hottie working at Google.
Michelangelo: The Party Boy
He's not the smartest or most complicated turtle to pick from, and you'll probably have to cover his half of the rent forever, but he can be a lot of fun. If you've had less dating success with other types, a dude like Mikey is definitely a low-maintenance break from the drama.
This guy is usually as excitable as he is hard to follow in conversations, but hey, he has muscles and will always share his pizza with you.