Who hasn't had those mornings when you have to find your bearings, find your clothes, then stroll through your campus or town in last night's clothes, utterly disheveled, perhaps even with blatant sex hair?

Everybody else who's already up -- walking their dog, taking morning jogs, or heading into the office -- knows why you're up so early, and their amused stares can make you want to crawl under a rock.

Still, this is 2014. Doesn't shame over a one-night stand belong in a bygone era? Shouldn't the Walk of Shame (kind of) be a stride of pride? Nowadays, the real walks of shame are other, far more embarrassing strolls.

1. Exiting a Starbucks restroom...

...after stinking up the facilities for 10 minutes, only to find an enormous line waiting on you.

2. Coming back to your car...

...after parking in a handicapped spot. (The lot was packed! And you were only going to be in the store for a second! Why is everyone looking at you like a monster?!)

3. Being led off the football field...

...after streaking onto it like a jackass, then being captured by security.

4. Bringing your order back to the counter...

...after realizing it's the wrong order. And you've accidentally already taken a bite of some dude's burger.

5. Riding the elevator down to the hotel's front desk...

...to get another key after being locked out of your hotel room. In your towel.

6. Heading back to your seat...

...after completely bombing a speech at a wedding, conference, or funeral.

7. Struggling to get through the day...

...with a nice big stain all over your shirt.

8. Hoping to make it back home undetected...

...after sharting your pants in public.

9. Walking down the aisle...

...as you're just now realizing you might be marrying the wrong person.