In a 33-minute media screening for [artist id="501686"]Britney Spears[/artist]' new documentary, "For the Record" — which airs Sunday, November 30, on MTV — we get a fuller sense of what the singer's life has been like in recent months; a series of sneak peeks have popped up over the last few days. In the screening, which took place Thursday (November 20), we see the singer on shopping trips in New York, shooting the music video for her single "Womanizer," and her daily contact with hordes of paparazzi.
In the special, Spears likens her life to the Bill Murray film "Groundhog Day," in which every day is the same. "It's like 'Groundhog Day' every day," she says. "It's really boring. Normal is really different for everybody. In my situation, I try to make it as normal as possible for me. It could be a lot worse."
She talks about the ways that her life has changed under the conservatorship of her father, Jamie — whom she pokes fun at in one of the clips from the show — but more so due to the constant media presence surrounding her.
"I used to be a cool chick," she says. "But I feel like the paparazzi has taken that away from me — like, the way I used to live my life. I used to be a cool chick but I'm not anymore."
She also admits in the special that she feels jealous of people like Jessica Alba, or even her younger sister Jamie Lynn Spears, who can go out with their children without being followed by a mob of paparazzi. And she admits that the people she surrounded herself with the last couple years of her life were not the types of people she should have been hanging out with.
"I had let people into my life that were just bad people," she said, adding later, "You're so busy you don't see what's going on. You don't have time to stop and think. ... It's important to have good people around you."
She also talks a lot about the demise of her marriage to Kevin Federline. "When it ended I felt so alone," she explains. "I didn't really wanna think about the reality of it. I never faced it. I just ran. He started to do an album for himself and he started to do things for himself, and I just never saw him anymore."
She addresses her well-chronicled breakdown after she and Federline split.
"My trust has really been battered," she says. "Sometimes it can get kinda lonely. I had totally lost my way. I lost focus. I lost myself. I let certain people into my life that were just bad people ... because I was lonely. I really paid the consequences for that. Big time."
However, she stresses that she doesn't consider herself a "victim."
"I don't like that," she says, "I've been placed in that category and I hate that."
Getting pumped about the Britney Spears documentary? Share your thoughts by uploading a video to YouRHere.MTV.com, or sound off in the comments section below. "For the Record" airs Sunday, November 30, at 10 p.m. ET on MTV.