The Golden Globes as we know them are [article id="1579150"]a thing of the past this year.[/article] No red carpet. No Nicholson in the front row. No convoluted explanation of who the Hollywood Foreign Press Association actually is or why every celebrity in Hollywood cares what they think. Instead, on Sunday night we'll have an anticlimactic list of winners to sift through as we hope against hope that the writers' strike is resolved before the Oscars come around in another month.

We've already detailed all the [article id="1579456"]collateral damage[/article] of this significantly scaled-back Golden Globes but there's one last byproduct of the neutered Globes telecast that MTV News is lamenting: the impossible-to-forget red carpet song. You know what we're talking about. It's the little ditty NBC creates every year to welcome you to their coverage, an astounding collection of star-laden lyrics set to whatever song we've all collectively been humming throughout the previous season. Recent shows have featured songs set to the tune of "Mambo #5" and "Don't Cha" (as in "Don't cha love that Russell can throw left hooks?/ Don't cha love the cowboy with his good looks?").

In the interest of helping us all slog through this year's song-less Globes, MTV News has created our very own crap-tacular concoction, set to the beat of Britney Spears' "Gimme More" (we considered "Umbrella," but it was too difficult). Memorize the lyrics as you wish.

"GIMME GLOBES"

Lyrics: Josh Horowitz!

Vocals: Megan Warner, Andrew Ross Rowe

Original song written by M. Araica/N. Hills/K. Hilson/J. Washington

Producers: Matt Harper, Rich Sancho

Editor: Joe DeShano

(It's the Globes, bitch!)

(I see you, Philip Seymour Hoffman, and I just wanna Globe with you!)

Every time they roll the carpet out

"Michael Clayton" and Nikki Blonsky show

Public display of affection

Feels like no one else is in the room (The room)

Javier's hair should have gotten more care

We'll keep on Globin' (Sweeney Todd)

We'll keep on Globin' (Marion Cotillard)

John C. Reilly is flashing, Travolta's dirty dancing

They keep Globin' (They keep Globin')

Keep Globin'

Even Angie's saying

[CHORUS]

Gimme gimme Globes

Gimme Globes

Gimme gimme Globes

Gimme gimme Globes

Gimme (Uh)

Gimme gimme Globes

Gimme gimme Globes

Gimme Globes

Gimme gimme Globes

Gimme gimme Globes

Gimme (Uh)

Gimme gimme Globes

America Ferrara ...

You don't have a shot in hell

But the Golden Globes are crazy

Even fashion 'bominations

Get nominations

With "Juno" around, is "Hairspray" going down?

We'll keep on Globin' (Keep on Globin')

We'll keep on Globin', Globin' (Uh-uh)

Viggo's got tattoos, Blanchett's got man boobs

They keep Globin' (Wait)

Keep Globin'

(The "Enchanted" princess is sayin')

[CHORUS]

Gimme gimme Globes

Gimme Globes

Gimme gimme Globes

Gimme gimme Globes

Gimme (Uh)

Gimme gimme Globes

Gimme gimme Globes

Gimme Globes

Gimme gimme Globes

Gimme gimme Globes

Gimme (Uh)

Gimme gimme Globes

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