When Emma Watson was cast as Belle in the upcoming live-action remake of "Beauty and the Beast," our number one question -- yes, before "who is going to play the Beast?" -- was "who is going to play Gaston?"
Well, as of Wednesday (March 4), that number one question has been answered. Variety reports that Luke Evans will play Gaston, which is perfect, since we have 21 solid times that he was already Gaston IRL -- or, you know, in movies. Same thing.
Anyway, here's your proof that Luke will be the perfect Gaston:
No one's slick as Luke Evans.
No one's quick as Luke Evans.
No one's neck (besides maybe Channing Tatum's) is as incredibly thick as Luke Evans'.
You can ask any Tom, Dick or Stanley, and they'll tell you whose team they prefer to be on.
No one's been like Luke Evans, a kingpin like Luke Evans.
No one's got a small cleft in his chin like Luke Evans!
As a specimen, yes, he's intimidating.
My, what a guy, that Luke Evans.
No one fights like Luke Evans.
Douses lights like Luke Evans.
In a wrestling match nobody BITES like Luke Evans!
There's no one as burly and brawny. As you see, he's got biceps to spare. Not a bit of him's scraggly or scrawny... however, ev'ry last inch of him is... not...covered with hair.
No one hits like Luke Evans.
Matches wits like Luke Evans.
In a spitting match nobody spits like Luke Evans! (He's especially good at expectorating.)
(Just pretend he's drinking out and not in, okay? Work with me, people.)
Ten points for Luke Evans!
No one shoots like Luke Evans.
Makes those beauts like Luke Evans.
Then goes tromping around wearing boots like Luke Evans!
In other words, there's just one guy in town who's got all of it down... and his name is L-U-K-E E-V-A-N-S.