Katy Perry gave Ed Sheeran quite the welcome when he crashed her recent interview with BBC Radio 1. "Thanks, babes, for keeping me off the No. 1 spot," she laughed, referencing their new songs "Chained to the Rhythm" and "Shape of You." She also jokingly flipped him off as he walked into the studio, which set the tone for the rest of their spirited interview with host Nick "Grimmy" Grimshaw.

Sheeran responded with an anecdote about the first time he met Perry, once when he had just gotten offstage and was drenched in sweat. Then, she didn't want to hug him and get his "DNA" all over her, but things would be different today: "Now that you're Ed Sheeran, it's like, put your ball sack on me," she laughed.

Yep. I warned you that things got really weird really fast. And they continued to get weird as the conversation drifted to (1) Sheeran sniffing Perry's armpits to get over losing at the Grammys; (2) how Ed was "off his tits" the first time he heard "I Kissed A Girl"; (3) Perry's fake British accent; and (4) poop — probably the least perplexing topic of them all.

"Did we talk about anything good?" Perry said as they wrapped things up, even getting in a plug for her new song. And then, of course, it was back to Sheeran: "He's approachable, he's the best, everybody loves him, no one's scared of him, they want to date him. They can have him."

"I could probably find you at least five people who really hate me," he countered. "I could put you in touch with them and you can have, like, a little powwow." Leave your SPF at home friends, because there's plenty of shade (and zero sunlight) here.