21 Unrealistic Expectations We Have About Cats Because Of 'Sailor Moon'
If you were a big fan of "Sailor Moon" growing up, then we're guessing that you're totally a cat person. After all, that TV show made cats out to be the coolest best friends you could ever have. Who wouldn't want to be granted magic powers from a talking feline companion?
But even if you're now a bonafide cat lady, you've gotta admit: "Sailor Moon" lied to us. Oh sure, we always knew our cats couldn't talk and probably weren't magic, but there's a lot of stuff we love about Luna, Artemis, and Diana that our own pets will just never be able to recreate. For example!
They will stand still long enough for you to put band-aids on them.
Let's be real, that's never happened.
They'll just follow you home one day and then you get to keep them.
No need for adoption!
The presents they give you are things you would actually want.
I'll take a magic pen over a dead bird any day.
They will wake you up when you're late for school.
More likely they will wake you up two hours earlier because they're hungry.
They could totally help you fight crime.
Let's face it, if a burglar tries to rob you, your cat's not going to do anything about it.
And they're really great at motivating you to do stuff.
Ever had a real cat on your lap? You never want to go anywhere.
They can make friends for you by jumping on people.
Cats are great icebreakers, but probably not THAT great.
They know how to use computers.
Most cats just sit on them, Luna.
They're totally cool with basically being bean bags.
I can point to actual scars on my body from when I've tried to get my cat to sit on me like that. Obviously I was not successful.
And they also can definitely go into public places with you.
Cats can hang out in diners and video game arcades, right?
They're so independent that they don't need to be cared for.
Have you ever seen a scratching post or a litter box on "Sailor Moon?" Of course not.
They're as boy crazy as you are.
Good luck kissing someone without any lips, Luna.
They make excellent hiding places.
No one can see you now.
They eat with tiny forks.
Also, where does one obtain a cat-sized headset?
They know exactly how to cheer you up.
With flowers, even!
They can cry.
Good thing this isn't a real thing. How the heck do you console a cat?
In fact, you can always tell what they're thinking.
If only cats were so expressive in real life.
If two cats have a baby, it looks like both of them mashed together.
Pretty sure that's not how genetics work?
They can pretty much live forever.
How old are Luna and Artemis by the end of the series, like... 2000?
They are totally judging you when you freak out about dieting.
Unlike mean Luna, real cats don't care what weight you are.
In fact they are definitely judging you at every opportunity.
Actually, that last one's real. Cats totally do that.