TRAGEDY! Ashlee Simpson Doesn't Suck in Chicago!

If you'd been waiting with bated breath to hear about Ashlee Simpson's disastrous London stage debut in Chicago, prepare to be as depressed as Miss Cleo at a Chippendale's. Sadly, Ashlee's band played the right song every time, and at no point was she forced to turn a minor glitch into a national embarrassment by doing a jig. Britain's Hello magazine says the younger Simpson "raised the roof" with a "flawless" performance as Roxie Hart.

This is a crushing blow, I know. We were all so ready for another round of Ashlee-Simpson-live-performance hilarity. Luckily, at least one Simpson sister looked ridiculous last night. Let these pics of a goth-style Jessica Simpson do for your blue balls what she did for Bam Margera's.

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