Not even an entirely new U.S. coast can keep the Jersey Shore: Family Vacation drama at bay.
Tonight's episode saw the gang's San Diego reunion going way off the rails not even 12 hours into their trip -- and during "the dopest pool party" ever (courtesy of Pauly D), no less.
"There is fighting going on while a lit pool party is right outside the f*cking window," Vinny said. "This is such a juxtaposition. It's the worst thing ever and the most lit thing ever next to each other, and I'm just sitting there in between wanting to jump out the window."
So how did we get here? Everyone had talked since the leaked wedding speech drama except for Angelina and JWOWW. Now, upon their arrival in SoCal, the two didn't waste time addressing the "elephant in the [hotel] room."
"Angelina, you don't admit anything ever," Jenni said. "Grow some balls. That's all I'm asking. Just f*cking tell the truth. All you have to do is say, 'I f*cking sold the speech.'"
Although Jenni and Ang continued to disagree over all things speech-related, Deena had high hopes that Jenni and the roommate formerly named after a filthy rodent (that nickname is officially dead now btw) would "find common ground" over Mike and his stirring of the
big witch's brew pot. And they certainly did for a moment. After it came to light that Mike (sorta jokingly) asked Jenni to interview Angelina's "sidepiece" Old Bridge on his Here's the Sitch podcast, the Staten Island native saw red.
"If I would have known this when I had asked Mike to come to my house the first time around, his ass would have been kicked the f*ck out," she said.
Enter Lauren and Mike -- several street tacos and chicken tendies in -- who had high hopes that San Diego would be nothing but "smooth seas."
"I've tried hard over the last couple of weeks before getting to this vacation to make sure that I was good with everyone," said the Sitch. "All the fires have been put out, and now it's positive vibes only."
But his fire extinguisher was faulty, as he instantly felt attacked by the roommates. And it wasn't long before Angelina and Lauren started going at it over who blocked who; meanwhile, Snooki and Deena became desperate to go have "a wine on the balcony" as the "dumpster fire" escalated, and Jenni began using her "mom voice."
As for Ang? "Here I am again being authentic," she said of the drama. "None of them say sh*t about their lives. You're gonna tell me every single one of the roommates, their marriages, and their relationships, their engagements are perfect? None of you talk about your own f*cking lives -- how about that?"
Cue Vinny: "Angelina's got some set of balls to say that she's the only person that shares her life. Like, we all share our lives -- it's just that you share your crazy life."
And at that point, Mike was just glad to finally not be at the center of the controversy.
"I'm happy that everyone is arguing over Angelina and not me," he said. "I walked into the devil's den, and to be honest, the Situation historically has been amazing at getting out of situations. And so now, what can you possibly be mad at me for?"
Tune in next Thursday at 8/7c to find out how the rest of the family vacation fares in San Diego (and if they ever do make it to that pool party).