Photos by Radhika Marya

Chicago, IL - If I remember this story correctly, my sister went to the very first Pitchfork Music Festival with her now-husband and spent most of the sweltering fest in the record tent. She bought a jazz CD, I think. My sis isn’t that into live music.

If she were here today, however, ma soeur would have been privy to a bevvy of activities to keep her busy while bro-in-law banged his head to Lightning Bolt and Art Brut or whoever it was that was playing the fest back then.

We scoped out some of the myriad things people who dislike music and/or listening to music can do at Pitchfork – aside from shoving things in their mouth holes.

1. Screenprint a T-Shirt

Did you sweat through the shirt you're wearing? Make a new one!

2. Get a haircut

Split ends are a drag and must be eradicated ASAP.

3. Marvel at some ancient technology

What do these little boxes do? JK! I know! They make fun noises when you bash them together, right?

4. Hug a Twinkie

Embrace nostalgia. Literally.

5. Play some games

You know, with something other than someone else's heart.

6. Try on clothes

Trust me, you could probably look more alt.

7. Hang out with Marnie The Dog

Marnie will be jetting around the fest all weekend -- try and catch her! She's like the wind.