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Here's Why Joseph Gordon-Levitt Wants Some Mother Lovin'

JoGo loves the moms.

So, Joseph Gordon-Levitt loves moms now.

Or at least that's the message he's putting out there with this hilariously bad lip-sync video of himself crooning about all the "Sexy Motha's" of the world. Yes, really.

The vid starts out with JoGo reading Charles Darwin's "The Origin of Species," which apparently teaches him that loving boobs is a caveman tradition because "a big-tittied cave lady could feed so many cave babies."

This somehow devolves into a lyrical play-by-play of all of the most enticing aspects of maternity, which ends with him and his pal breaking into a PTA conference and macking on mommies.

We went ahead and counted down the best lyrics in ascending order of awkward awesomeness. You're welcome.

  1. "If you're a mother, I wanna give your child a brother (or a sister) -- I just wanna give our chromosomes a happy home."
  2. "And her kid can be my built-in mini-best buddy -- we can play Nintendo after I help him study."
  3. "Let's get busy... putting money in a college fund."
  4. "Ladies pushing toddlers on a swing, girl I know you can take care of your offspring."
  5. "She got a minivan with those low-down seats; we can pull over and get it while the baby's asleep."
  6. "Ooh, I want a girl with a big fat vocabulary."
  7. "Someday you could be a grandma, and that's twice as hot."
  8. "I'm sorry I rumpled your duvet, but I had to work on that bootay."

BRB. Gotta clean the soda off of everything now.