• Season 1, Ep 9

sneak peek: Escape from Prom

After getting busted for drinking at prom, this young man makes a daring escape.

03/01/2016 · 3:12

>> I had been to 14 proms

throughout my high school.

The story begins, I got asked to

go to another girl's prom.

I throw on my mighty situation

tux with a cane.

For some reason, I thought that

was cool.

We get in the limo and that's

when things kind of, uh,

take a turn.

The second the doors close,

these kids start popping

bottles.

We roll up to the hotel.

And I realized that these kids

are lit.

They step out and it's like,

"Whoa!

"Like, oh, it's just my heels.

"I don't know how to walk

in 'em."

So, we like get in, but like it

lasted about 24 minutes.

This guy comes up to our table

and he's like, "Hey, will you

and your date come with us?"

And I'm like, ha-ha, I'm

probably gonna win Prom King

again.

I'm like, okay, here we go,

baby, and it ain't even

my school.

And they walk us up in these

staircases and I'm like,

oh, no, I ain't the king.

The room is just full of a bunch

of crying kids and there's like

12 police officers.

You got two teachers and you

got that one gym coach who is

still wearing a gray sweat suit.

So, they basically say, "If you

"admit to drinking, you won't

"get in trouble.

We'll just send you home."

Twenty kids raise their hands

and like, "I drank. I'm sorry."

And they start handcuffing

these kids.

This gym teacher guy, he's been

waiting for this,

like he's been excited for this

since like September.

"You're gonna learn today."

And I'm like, oh, no.

This is--

I'm not having this.

I'm gonna make a dash.

But I only got one shot at this.

So, the gym teacher's standing

right next to me,

and I'm doing like a typical,

"I honestly can't believe

young kids would drink."

So these two kids start arguing

that they can't call their

parents.

And the gym teacher steps up,

"This is it! I've had it!"

He walks away.

That's my moment.

I just take off.

And I hear him yelling,

"We got a runner!"

And I'm like, vroom, I sprint,

I got my cane... [panting]

You know the gym teacher back

there, trying to chase after me.

He gets like four steps and...

[panting]

And I like fly down the steps.

I whip into this prom and I'm

like, I'm snakin' through

the dance.

I'm like, "What up, girls?

What's up, Johnny?"

I'm trying to like blend,

like, right in.

I'm clearly not blending in

'cause I'm sweating.

And like right then, the gym

teacher comes up.

He's like... [panting]

"Get him! Get him!"

And I just like sprint down this

emergency exit.

And I honestly have no idea if

anyone's actually chasing me,

at this point, but in my head,

there are like 12 police

officers, guns drawn,

coming at me like,

"Gun! Come back!"

I jump out of this window.

And like, I drop my mighty-

situation cane.

You just hear, it's like...

[imitates breaking sound]

And you kind of see it roll

away.

And I'm laying there and I got

that moment where I'm on the

concrete, and I see the cane,

and I know they're coming.

And I hear the Captain Douche

Bag... [panting]

I'm like, okay, I gotta go, and

I literally run like two miles.

And I have my boy, I'm like,

"Yo, Dude, you gotta pick me up.

"Like I just escaped the prom.

"Like literally, they got

an APB on me."

He was like, "I'm gonna be

there."

And I'm just sprinting and

sprinting.

I get in his car and I'm like--

And then we're like--

The next day on the news,

"The local high school's prom

"was ruined by alcohol.

"Sixty students were arrested.

One actually fled the scene."

It was like a sketch.

It looks like nothing like me.

My dad didn't find out.

Thank God.

If he would have, I probably

wouldn't be here today to tell

that story.

>> ♪