• Season 32, Ep 6

sneak peek: dealing with depression

Orlana explains her falling out with Jordan, and how crippling depression can be.

11/07/2016 ยท 1:43

- Is this the place?- Yeah.

- I'm getting really nervous.- Why?

- No, don't get nervous.- 'Cause it's just, like,

what if I say what I have to sayand then it's just awkward

and then we're justsitting there, eating dinner?

- Wait, what are you goingto say though?

- I, like--I just don'tunderstand what I did wrong.

And like, that--having that unanswered feeling

is the reasonwhy I'm so insecure.

'Cause I just beatmyself up over it.

He just--done.

- And in order for thingsto work out with Travis,

you need to close that door.- Yeah.

- Lock it, throw away the key.

- No, for real.

I don't think people get it.

Like, words hurt.It affects you every single day.

And that's huge.

Because...

Yeah, I know, 'cause I--I become low.

Like, really, really low, and...

I don't want to belike that again,

and I felt that waywhen I was her friend.

Depression and suicidecomes in many different ways.

I told Jordan this,and one day, I was just like,

"I'm in a funk and I've triedto commit suicide once."

And she was just like, "What?"

And I think she just didn't lookat me the same way

as she did before.

She doesn't thinksuicide is like a--

like, she just thinkssuicide is stupid.

She's like, "that's dumb."I mean, it's not that easy.

Like, people every day, like,have mental diseases.

Like, you don't want to live,but she thinks it's dumb.

Like, she thinksthere's no excuse.

- That's terrible.

- No, it hurt my feelings,like...