• Season 5

sneak peek: butch denies his addiction

Butch has trouble owning up to his addiction during the “Being Butch” special — airing July 18th at 9/8c!

07/11/2016 · 1:45

- No.- So do you think it's possible

to like someonelike you like--

say, you like me, right?'Cause we've been going--

we've known each othersince 12, 13.

- Mm-hmm.- When I was using,

you didn't dislike me,did you?

You liked me, but you didn'tlike what I was doing, right?

- Yeah,because the whole thing

about usingand that sort of thing, it...

- I didn't like you at all.

- It--it changesa person's disposition

and personality, really.

But you stilllike the person.

You hear people say,"Now, this is the Butch I knew,"

or, "This is the"--- I know.

I heard it my whole life.

Mom told me,and everyone else told me,

"Well, you know,your dad ain't ah-nah-nah."

And I'm like,"Whatever, okay."

- Once you reconditionyour brain to think

of a different wayof living life,

you're no longer dependenton any kind of alcohol or drug.

I was never addictedto crack cocaine.

I was--I enjoyed doing it'cause I thought I liked it.

I liked that rush.- People say--

- What? Are yousaying you weren't

addicted tocrack cocaine?

- What? I feel likeyou were addicted to it.

- Is that what you just said?

- No, I was never addictedto crack cocaine.

[somber music]

- When I busted you--- But--but don't you remember--

don't you remember--you don't remember

sending that text message?

I remember--I rememberthat text message clear as day.

It said, "I'm sorry to say--I know this is bad,

"but I do love cocainemore than you,

and I'm sorry."

- Because I kept using it.- Mm-hmm.

- So I told myself,"I must love this more

than I do them."

I was emotionally,spiritually bankrupt.

It was gone.

I didn't--I didn't knowexactly what I was doing.

- Dad, that's addiction.- So I didn't know how to,

uh, processwhatever I was feeling.

- Right,you're numbing it out.

You're substituting itwith something else.

- You guys can call itwhatever you want.

- Okay.- I just--

you know,you can name it.

- It was just weirdto hear you say,

"I was never addictedto crack cocaine."