• Season 1, Ep 2

Sneak Peek: The Worst Eye Witness

Chloe Hilliard explains how embarassing it is when news reporters pick the wrong person to interview.

10/13/2016 · 2:03

Now, she's actuallyone of my favorite people

that makes me laughon and offstage.

I need y'all to give it up

for my homegirlChloe Hilliard, y'all.

Make some noise for Chloe,y'all.

[cheers and applause]

- Yes!

I love watchingthe Trump rallies

because for the first timein my black life,

I get to see white peoplebe embarrassed

by other white people.



[cheers and applause]

It's a level of embarrassmentthat black people know.

Like, we get embarrassedevery time we watch the news

and see that they pickedthe worst eyewitness.


[cheers and applause]

Like, they show up at the scene of the crime.

Looks around like, "Who can give me the most

"articulate depiction?

"Okay, you got all your teeth. No.

"You, sir, over there, with the garbage bag full of cans.

You want to beon the news tonight?"


And he always looks the same.

It's, like, a man bald on thetop with cornrows on his side.


No teeth in the front.

She's like, "Sir, would you like to tell us

what happened with the fire?"

"No, youse lady bitch, it was crazy!



[cheers and applause]

"Hey, I saw the fire. The building was cracking.

It was like, 'Zoop, zap, zip.' I was like, 'Oh, my God!'"


"I don't even livein a building.

"I live in the sewer.

But I got out first."

"How'd you get out first?" "Oh, I started the fire.

I was drying my socks."


"You know, there's a leprechaun in that tree up there.

There's a leprechaun."

laughter ]

Thank you, guys.My name's Chloe.

- Give it up for Chloe Hilliard,y'all.

[cheers and applause]

Now don't do anything stupidlike changing the channel.

We'll be right back, y'all.

"Acting Out."

[cheers and applause]