• Season 1, Ep 8

sneak peek: I lost a tooth

The moral of the story: don't try to open a screw-off bottle with your teeth.

02/23/2016 · 3:42

>> [electronic music]

>> Okay, so this story takes

place about two summers ago so

listen closely because there's

a lot of details

and it comes quick.

So our buddy, Rob, throws a

theme party almost every,

every weekend.

It's a blue themed party

so we decided to go--

>> Blue Man Group.

>> --as Blue Man Group.

>> MAN #2: And our buddy took

out a big vodka bottle--

>> MAN #3: And we started

drinking shots.

>> And it wasn't like, uh...

>> This was cheap stuff.

>> It was lower than the lower.

>> This was cheap.

This is where it starts

to go hazy.

So I got up on the table

and started reciting Training

Day lines.

"King Kong ain't got [bleep]

on me!"

>> Our pre-game rituals was

watch Training Day because it

just hypes us up and this is

where I lost Ryan for about 10

minutes and I find him on the

dance floor and he's on the wall

dancing with his girl.

>> RYAN: No.

>> She is massive.

She's not just big, she's big,

big, and I'm pretty sure

her name was Rhonda.

>> No, it was not Rhonda.

>> And, um, I'm looking

and I'm listening.

I'm getting closer and I'm

hearing what he's saying, "Oh

yeah, baby, that's all me.

That's all me."

And I'm on the ground this time,

I'm rolling.

>> This was the last thing,

pretty much, I remembered at

the night, you know because

it started to go hazy.

A beautiful girl walks.

Beautiful, the most beautiful

girl I've ever seen.

>> He walked right over to her

and introduces himself.

He likes to impress people

so we start taking some shots.

>> Yeah, that's true.

>> MAN #2: He gets the vodka

bottle, he tells us, "Watch

this," and I'm like, "Okay,

what is this guy going to do?"

He dives into this vodka bottle.

He comes up with the biggest

smile I have ever seen

in my life.

He pops up and he's got

no tooth.

He's got a little fragment of

a tooth left and that's it.

>> The tooth was gone!

>> He tried to open the vodka

bottle which, mind you, is a

twist off thinking that it's a

cork it's going to pop open like

some champagne bottle.

>> He wouldn't tell me!

>> No.

>> He didn't tell me that

the tooth was gone.

>> I wanted some entertainment.

>> So I'm going around the party

I'm talking-I'm continuing to

talk to this with no tooth

in my mouth, I'm dancing--

>> Of all nights, too, he's the

most social I've ever seen him.

He's just-the biggest wide smile

I've ever seen and our closest

friends, I mean, they wanted to

tell him, but I was like, "Nah,

why don't we just let this ride

out and see what happens."

So I'm looking at this kid,

he's blue--

>> "He's blue.

He's blue."

>> He's sweatin', he's got a

raspy voice from yelling Denzel

lines all night.

>> "You think you can do this

[bleep] to me?

I run [bleep] here,

you just live here!"

At what point did I pass out?

Because I passed out,

that I remember.

>> Oh no, you passed out but

that was-we still did

some more shots.

>> Oh we did?

>> MAN #2: I'm not sure how this

is possible but this is when he

gets that girl's number.

>> RYAN: I told--

>> MAN #2: Yeah, you came up

to me and you showed me.

I'm surprised you even knew how

to, to slide your phone on.

>> I wake up the next morning on

the living room floor in nothing

but my shoes and my boxers, but

because my shoes were still on

these [bleep] wrote all over me.

>> MAN #2: With a Sharpie.

>> RYAN: Just penises all over

my arm, my face--

They drew one going

into my mouth.

I look up, I see gimmoke

and he says, "Go upstairs,

look in the mirror."

>> And all of a sudden I hear

the biggest scream.

>> [screams]

>> RYAN: My tooth was gone.

It was outrageous, but I think

the best part was that when I

did realize I had the girl's

number in my phone we ended

going out to breakfast.

>> I have no idea

how that happened.

>> Yes, I managed to do that.

I managed to do it and as I meet

her at the restaurant this girl

throws me a box of Chiclets

>> She threw you Chiclets?

>> She just threw the box at-I

don't think I ever

told you that.

I know it was embarrassing.

It was a fail, but it was a

success, right?

From one negative comes a


>> More of a fail, but yeah.

>> But it's, I mean--but you

lose and you gain so it's the

same thing.

>> It's like a--

>> RAPPER #1: ♪ At the carwash

♪ We be fly for nothin'

>> RAPPER #2:

♪ Have you fly for nothin'

♪ I roll with O-G-E

♪ -- Coppin' that profit

♪ We call that O-P-P

♪ Tell them tap it