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Name: Rebekah

Date: 1.10.03

 MTV.com Member Profile
Rebekah talks about God, tribulation, and self-growth:

I'll start by saying that Tough Enough happened to me at a really bad time in my life. I was told that I would have a final phone interview before selections, but instead, Al came to my front door. I had every intention of telling them over that phone that this was a bad time and that I couldn't do it, but that all changed when Al showed up. It was so stressful trying to get out of here in 2 days!

I wouldn't change going to or leaving the show, but I wish things could have been different because I know I'm built for this. I loved the training and it fits my personality, much to peoples' disbelief. It doesn't go against my Chrisitian beliefs to be a wrestler. The physical part was the easy part. The hard part was not having support from my family and my boyfriend constantly bitching to me about being there.

I was a little disappointed in the portrayal of my character on the show. I am a difficult person to get to know and I'm not going to just open myself up to people I don't even know. I do have a tendency to be a little quiet and I had a lot to think about at that time. I also had an injury. I busted my tailbone and I couldn't sit down.

I was there for almost two and a half weeks and Big, out of the blue, asked me how my family was doing, and I just lost it. He said that I'm doing her a lot of good then because I'd be able to take care of her later, but she needed me then, not later, and I had to go. A few days later I left. I've grown a lot from this experience and I've learned that no matter what I do or what I say someone is also going to have an opinion about me. I go to a very conservative school that I almost got kicked out of because of all this. I didn't drink or kiss anybody, but I'm still looked down upon for doing Tough Enough. I really and truly learned a lot about myself, and the type of person and Christian that I want to be. I'm much less conservative than I was before this school, and I'm much less self-righteous. Many Christians think of themselves as better than other people who aren't "saved." They kind of put themselves up on a pedestal and they become so prideful, self-centered, and selfish that they can't even see what God is doing around them. They set poor examples of being a Christian. They put too much emphasis on religion and the legalism of their faith, instead of the true meaning, which is the personal relationship with Christ and sharing that with other people. Christ doesn't judge people the way we do.

I know that some people in the house were kind of perplexed about where I stood, and they went as far as to say that I make up my own religion, but that's just silly. I can be a Christian and still go out and have fun. Christians can have fun and they can have friends who are non-Christians. I often prefer my non-Christian friends because they are real. My only disadvantage, I guess, is the fact that I'm a good dancer. It's always been a stress reliever for me. I don't have to be all over somebody to be able to dance and have fun. Anyone who is a responsible person can be a responsible drinker. Nobody is going to look out for you but you. It's unfortunate that I was portrayed in the typical Christian stereotype, as someone who doesn't follow what they preach, but that's not true for me. All that matters to me is my personal relationship with Christ. I don't care if anyone has a bad opinion of me.

The only thing I regret is the argument between Scott and I because I made a joke about him being in the Asian club, and he reacted very strongly to it. It came as a surprise to me because I was also behind him and supported him, and fixed him dinner every night. It surprised me that he cussed me out. The only part that was aired was me being bent about it, not Scott going crazy. They didn't show that part. He just went crazy on me. He spoke to me in a way that no one should. Even Jonah told him that he shouldn't talk to me like that. And me working at Hooters has nothing to do with me as a person or Christian.

It's really difficult for me to watch the show because I know my life would be very different now if I had stayed. I still have every interest in pursuing a wrestling career. I know that I'm in better shape than Jamie. I know that I'm more athletic and that I have a better build. It's hard to watch because I know that that could have been me. But I'm really glad for her for having stuck it out, and I look forward to seeing her to talk about it. I was regretful when I got home from the show about being there. I wish that I hadn't gone, but not anymore. It was hard and it destroyed my life at home at first but it was beneficial to me as a person.

I hope and I would be shocked if anyone else but John and Matt wins this. They are both so athletic and they are in awesome shape. My heart just went out to Matt and what he went through. He definitely got his head kicked in. I knew he wouldn't quit though. I don't think that really crossed his mind, and even if it did, I don't think it was an option for him. I think they both have the ability to be WWE superstars. I know from interacting with Eric and Jonah that Matt and John are much easier to work with, they do everything right. I'm pretty confident that it will be Matt and John who win.

I want to give a shout-out to Jamie. People tell me that I should have been there, but I'm not, she is. I want to wish everyone the best of luck.

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