'CT: The abbreviation for WCT, which is an abbreviation for World Championship Tour, which consists of the top 44 male surfers and top 16 female surfers in the ASP, which itself is an abbreviation.
ASP: Association of Surfing Professionals, sort of the NFL of surfing that started in 1976.
Barbies: As cute and smart as the beloved doll.
Big Mama: A loving term for the ocean.
Blue Crush: A 2002 movie that could have been 15 minutes long if all the slo-mo surfing scenes (and the endless loop of Anne Marie slamming her head on the reef) had run at normal mo. Also a term for a wave with a height way over your head.
bro: Short for brother, meant figuratively, not literally. Try to use it at the end or beginning (or both) of every sentence. Say "brah" in Hawaii and "my male sibling" if you're a freak.
brobonics: Unique bro-to-bro communication, heavy on the "bro."
brodad: Anybody whose tongue you'll rip out and bury on the beach unless he or she stops calling every frickin' person a "bro."
brodeo: A barbecue where you invite all your bros. Apparently a rodeo where you invite all your bros would be called a brobecue.
bro time: Time with your bros.
burrito money: The spare change, Tic Tacs and lint in your pocket that you might be able to barter for that staple of the surfer diet.
chummin': Taking off your wetsuit and swimsuit in favor of surfing in the suit God gave you on your birthday.
combro:One bro who mixes work and pleasure, somebody you might be friends with even if you weren't doing business together.
couch surf: When Motel 6 is out of your price range, crash in your friends' living rooms, though never too long at any one place.
docking a sub: Becoming so scared you let the S.S. Crap out in your wetsuit.
doing a sauna: Letting a cascade of urine warm up your wetsuit.
double hold-down: When not one, but two waves slam overhead in succession, keeping you trapped underwater. You do not want to try holding your breath through a triple hold-down.
drop in: To launch onto the face of the wave off its peak, sometimes cutting in front of others, if that's what it takes.
ego surfing: Like Web surfing, only you go on Google and find out how many times your name appears.
epic: The glorious stuff of which legends, myths and heroes are made.
get worked: Similar to "get pounded," which is short for "having a 60-ton wave crash on your poor defenseless body to leave you as limp as a jellyfish."
go to church: In the tube.
green monster: Not the Hulk, but hulking big waves.
green womb: That spot inside the tube, that tunnel of wave where surfers are photographed to maximize the cool factor. It can lead to flashbacks of a warm, comforting time, just don't assume the fetal position.
groms:Young surfers who are still learning the sport.
hanging one: Refers to how many parts of your body are hanging off the nose of the board. Usually it's "five" or "10" for the number of toes. Hanging one or 13 involves other more, uh, private parts.
instabro: A real smooth operator who stakes a fast claim on your friendship.
in the Pope's living room: In the tube.
in the whirling cathedral: In the tube.
lonic: Dwarfish bastard of the saying, "Later on, dude."
ripping: Maneuvering fast and furious on a wave.
s'later: Quick way to say, "See you later." Take out the apostrophe, and it's the last name of surfing champ Kelly Slater.
session: A chunk of time spent surfing.
shubee: A poseur who dresses up in surf clothes bought at a Pac Sun mall store to wear not while surfing but while walking around said mall.
skin it: Nothing but your epidermis touching water.
stoked: Getting fired up with the ultimate rush. Try to use this word almost as often as "bro."
surfing in Nebraska: Having a brain as vast and empty as the Great Plains.
throwin' the tools in the shed: Going for broke in a tube even though you know it'll likely collapse on you. If you can't remember this term, make up your own, like "tossin' the fries in the Happy Meal."
tube radical: In a surf contest, this is a high-scoring ride through a tube, completely disappearing in it, then emerging out the end before it collapses.
washing machine: That swirling, churning water underneath a wave that cleans your clock.