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Jordan's Post-Show Commentary

When I first began my pledge period I was excited. Times were great other than the fact that I knew there were girls that cared little for me. But, as the days went on I felt that group grow. I began to ask myself, could I represent this group? Or better yet, can I let this group represent me? The answer is obvious. When I made the decision to walk away, I was not focused on the fact that there were some individual girls that would rather see me gone. What mattered to me were the means by which Sigma as a whole chose to handle sensitive situations.

There are issues that each individual on some level probably wishes hadn't been edited out. But, in regards to why so many wanted to de-pledge I feel there is more to the story that really should not be disregarded. The pledge class as whole wanted to join Sigma and as a whole we were told that so long as we got the points needed, we were in. However, Sigma did not plan to initiate us as a whole despite what they had been telling us. Yes, in the beginning we were informed that we may lose some points along the way, but we were specifically told that Sigma does not "vote" people away. I really grew to dislike Sigma as a whole at this point because it became obvious that there are double standards not only on an individual level but also within the organization as a whole. They wanted to extend the pledge periods for specific girls. (Granted, they never said up front that they would not do that.) However, they were not going to let it be known which girls were going to be subject to the extension until the blue and gold dinner. They planned to initiate only some of the pledge class, despite everything they had been telling us. I asked if they knew which girls would have an extension, and they denied knowing. At that point it was clear to me which path to take.

When I left I took the best part of Sigma with me without being initiated. That is by no means a cheap shot at the girls in it. I have a lot of respect for many of the young woman. On an individual level I feel stronger, and even more so because I do not need such a group to feel as though individually I can accomplish more. On the other hand, there was a time I did need Sigma and I have to respect that as well. I needed the group to teach me all that I have learned. OK, OK, so I cry too much. Great. So I can be stubborn and maddening. Fine. Yeah, I have a hard time watching myself continually asking for apologies. Wonderful. But, I think I sent a message, and looking back I do not regret a thing because to me, everybody took something whether they want to admit it or not.


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