Fraternity Life: Episode 6
Just 'cos she dances go-go
It don't make her a ho, no!
Sara, put your red shoes on
We going to Soho
We gonna elope in B-Lo
Called up my mama and pledge bros to say
I'm in love with a stripper, yo.
Every boy goes though that stripper phase in life. Earl had the pleasant experience of going through it on national television.
But first, what's the matter with our "super pledge"? Paul is a great guy. He loves his work, and always on top of his s--t, maybe a little too much. It's hard to open up to a bunch of guys who you live with but really don't know.
When it came to the line-up, Paul was the best out of us all. I'm just plain retarded when it comes to the line-ups. I think that our line-up order was arranged from smartest to most retarded. Pledging is all about time management and workload…and don't forget bonding and growing friendships. You have to balance these things out, I had the bonding down but that's about it. I've always sucked at memorizing things. That's why I loved being number 7, they hardly ever got to me.
Paul did wear a "sign that says mom." I actually called him "dad" for most of the time. He was the man around house, always going to work and doing schoolwork and cleaning while we were having fun (if you define fun as shooting fire extinguishers at each other and beating each other). We were like peas in a pod.
Rat time. Earl was on that stripper like flies on fresh s--t and a fat chick on a Quarter Pounder. I love the comment Earl makes: "it's kind exotic and erotic at the same time." Earl hit the nail on the head when he said, "Strippers are just a tease." Then he was sucked in, no pun intended. Sara the stripper, that's what I'll call her for now, claims she enjoys her work. Yep, so do the nurses that help old dudes s--t at nursing homes. Sara, who I thought was Nicole sitting on Earl's lap, doing some overtime work, exclaims "you're gonna take me out." This is typical stripper gold-digging action.
Sara is calling, "Lets go out!" At least Earl sounded a little bit better on the phone then I did with Nicole. A dyslectic kid on a crack pipe would have done better than me. I think this is when we realized Earl was really taking out the stripper and "whining and dining her!" Oh man, let the ripping begin. "He can take the Rover if he brings the strippers over." We were going to let him take it, we were just joking. We didn't want her coming over...all of us didn't have our rabies shots yet.
Earl and I were just sittin' on our beds chatting. I was trying to get him to change his mind. No such luck. Steve was just sitting there like a little sidekick. I tried to tell him it's a phase and to get over it quick because it's only good as long as your money last and they are out of there like the gold diggers they are. Yeah and Earl will pay, plus the "just hangin' with a stripper charge." I know she is "a lot of fun to be with" but so are circus carnies.
Earl, I respect you and who you like and what you do. I'm sorry for being a d-k. I know I am. I know you think she is "damn sexy" and I'm proud of you. I respect that message you sent out. When it comes down to everything whatever makes you happy and gets you through the day is what we want for you. You made good use of the Boom Boom Room.
Next Week: Rules are broken? Which time and which ones? Dan is outtie.