Now we know the truth: The Situation was felled in Florence, Italy, not by Ronnie's mighty punch but by an inadvisable decision to head-butt a wall.
Yes, Sunday's (August 28) episode of "Jersey Shore" finally answered the roomie-vs.-roomie-brawl question that had been haunting the cast's shenanigans in Italy. But just as one reality-show door was fist-pumped closed, a whole new one was opened up during the Video Music Awards pre-show, when MTV debuted a sneak-peek trailer of what's to come for the rest of the season. Oh, let us count what madness there will be! Deena forgetting to slip on her "underwears" before doing the limbo in a club. Ronnie clutching a firework between his teeth. Snooki enjoying some Sapphic pleasure one minute and declaring her affection for "Italian whale sperm" the next. JWoww giving a reality-show costar a "reality check."
There are car crashes and Breathalyzers and the threat of the entire cast getting deported. There are strippers using lotion in a less-than-family-friendly manner and then Snooki using a bottle of wine as a weapon. Speaking of which, Snickers' boyfriend Jionni threatens to kill Vinny. All of which leads Pauly to give us a new definition of STD: Stop the drama!
Sorry, Pauly, but NGH: Not gonna happen. We wouldn't want it any other way. We like our "Jersey Shore" the way we like our VMAs: pretty freaking nuts. And so does the cast, who did everything they could to avoid the wrath of Hurricane Irene to make it to Los Angeles for the big show. "We had to get out here for the VMAs. MTV did whatever they could to get us out here. We even had a private jet chartered for us because we wouldn't miss it for the world," Vinny told MTV News on Saturday, adding with a laugh, "Yo, Irene! F--- you!"
Don't miss "Jersey Shore" every Thursday at 10 p.m. ET/PT on MTV.
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