You've seen the cars, watched the clips and have the trailer memorized. But it's in Alan Dean Foster's "Transformers" novel where you'll discover the juiciest secrets about one of this summer's most anticipated action blockbusters. There's no need to transform yourself into a bookworm, however — not with MTV News on your side.
We read the book, pulled a few of the best bits and present them below. But beware, there's much more than meets the eye to some of this information. In other words, spoilers abound.
For more "Transformers" coverage, read about the robots hitting the red carpet at the MTV Movie Awards, watch exclusive clips from the flick or scope out smokin' sneak shots of the cars.
Just like a man not to ask for directions.
He's the most powerful Decepticon in the universe, a sentient robot capable of millions of individual thoughts per second, a being whose intelligence is dwarfed only by his malice, but could somebody please hand Megatron a map? After miscalculating his earthly descent, Megatron winds up encased in ice north of the Artic Circle, where he rests frozen until — in the movie's first scene — he's found by Captain Archibald Witwicky in 1897.
This is why we don't help strange robots.
After finding Megatron, Witwicky is blinded, and a tiny map is printed on his glasses — a map to an ancient Energy Cube that can be found on Earth, a cube that animates Transformers and gives them life. (And which Megatron wants to use to animate machines for his war with the Autobots.) This is why Earth has become the robots' new battlefield. Witwicky is locked in an insane asylum for his troubles, but his glasses are eventually passed on to his great-great-grandson, Sam (Shia LaBeouf).
Visit eBay for all your intergalactic shopping needs. That's eBay. eBay.
What's the first order of business for Optimus Prime and company when they arrive on Earth? That's right, to download the Internet. All of it. Especially eBay, which is mentioned roughly 18 million times. Of particular interest to the Transformers is an auction for an old pair of nautical spectacles, being sold by user "LadiesMan217." Seriously, would it have been too much to ask that his handle was "KarenAllenIsMyMom12?"
No, actually. I really am just a superficial high school student.
It's the series' most famous line, but it's not actually applied to any of the film's robots. "You think I'm shallow, huh?" Mikaela (Megan Fox) says at one point. "No, I think ... I think there's a lot more to you than meets the eye," Sam responds.
Don't turn that dial. We'll be back with the best mix of the '80s, '90s and today, right after this.
We know from early footage that young Sam buys a car that turns out to be the Transformer known as Bumblebee, who for some reason can't talk in this movie. So how does he communicate? By scanning the airwaves for radio snippets that correspond to how he feels. DJ Bumbles (as he's known in some club circles) spins the Cars' "Drive," Bad Company's "I'm Ready for Love," Marvin Gaye's "Sexual Healing" and Player's "Baby Come Back," all within the movie's first act. And his name? He gets it from Muhammad Ali — "Float like a butterfly, sting like a bee." "I bought Satan's Camaro," Sam says. "I think it wants my soul."
If he had also been a Ford Prefect, now THAT would have been funny.
Optimus Prime's first words are in Chinese, since it's the planet's most-spoken language, and he assumes all dominant life-forms speak it. But his first words in English are worth the wait: "Do not fear," he says, leaning down toward Sam and Mikaela. "Freedom from fear and all else is the right of sentient beings. We will never harm humans."
Enjoy the Dam movie. This is the best Dam part.
All the main characters wind up meeting at the Hoover Dam, which it's revealed was built by a mysterious government organization known as Sector Seven specifically to hide sporadic emanations from the Energy Cube (which they keep hidden). Sector Seven basically functions as the Men in Black in the film, showing up to cause trouble and give information as needed. Turns out they keep Megatron locked up in ice right next to the Cube (dumb). Also, they don't confiscate cell phones from visitors, meaning a Decepticon like Frenzy can enter disguised as a T-Mobile sidekick (really dumb). Once the other Decepticons show up, they batter down the Dam walls.
Yeah, I know what we said, but there's no way this is going to "stay" in Vegas.
Escaping the dam, a battle ensues on the road to Vegas between the remaining Autobots and Decepticons. It's the most balls-to-the-wall sequence in the book, and if appropriately realized, is sure to be the best action sequence of the summer.
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