Sheryl Crow's #1 Fan Free To Soak Up The Sun
A deranged Sheryl Crow fan accused of stalking the singer for 15 months was acquitted on all counts yesterday.
Ambrose Kappos, 38, spoke with reporters outside the courtroom following the verdict and described the whole mess as nothing more than "an honorable man trying to court a good woman."
In case you were curious, Kappos' "courting" techniques included singing Crow's songs from his parent's porch, breaking into a ballroom while Crow was rehearsing, repeatedly phoning Crow's sister in hopes to arrange a meeting, and finally, smoking marijuana and "super hydrating" himself by drinking at least 2 gallons of water in order to send Crow telepathic messages. Nothing unusual.
In fact, Best Week Ever's Brian Huskey also has unique ways of reaching Sheryl Crow.
"I tend to communicate with Sheryl Crow by eating a lot of ham and urinating. That always seems to work, I can't explain it."
Now that the trial is over, it's believed that Kappos, will finally be able to devote time to other interests, like stalking Crow's boyfriend, Lance Armstrong.
But just in case Kappos wants to stick to stalking musicians, Huskey has a suggestion for him.
"I hear that Tim McGraw is available for stalking. Why not try him?"
Ken Jennings is such a Loser!
Jeopardy genius Ken Jennings is done.
The man who amassed $2.5 million during his record 74 consecutive victories on Jeopardy finally lost last night, ending his six month stay on the show.
According to Sherrod Small of Best Week Ever, just because his Jeopardy streak is over, it doesn't mean Jennings has to give up on game shows altogether.
"Go to Price is Right man. It ain't over yet. Ken, I believe in you. It ain't over."
Jennings, a devout Mormon from Salt Lake City, Utah, was ultimately defeated by Nancy Zerg, a real estate agent from California.
Michael Colton, one half of the Modern Humorists, believes that Jennings will enjoy this much needed time off.
"Ken Jennings must be ready to go back to Salt Lake City and just relax. With his three wives, of course."
IN CASE YOU MISSED IT
Ashlee Simpson has announced that she will begin her first headlining tour this February, giving her fans the opportunity to finally see her lip-sync in person
Pamela Anderson was caught doing the "walk of the shame" at Stephen Dorff's house on Sunday morning, which is common since most people leave his house ashamed.