Corrosion Of Conformity Held At Border

Guys, next time just pay for the malted milk balls. OK?

To be sure, musicians have been busted for more, but maybe not

less. Non-conformist rockers Corrosion of Conformity were held up for five

hours at the Canadian border last Tuesday night (February 11) en route from

Fargo, North Dakota, to Winnipeg, Manitoba on account of some malted milk

balls. According to a source at their label, the band was held up at the border

while authorities performed a "rigorous background check," which revealed that

bassist Mike Dean had been arrested in 1983 in Raleigh, North Carolina, and

charged with larceny.

But it gets better. Apparently, back in his youthful,

punk rock days, Dean and the band used to frequent a quickie mart called the

Big Star supermarket and one night, Dean, no doubt standing out on account of

his mohawk, pinched a free sample, a solitary carob-coated malted milk ball.

Unfortunately for him, an observant off-duty cop was working the Big Star beat

that night and busted him. Dean landed in jail for a night and was bailed out

the next day. Which means that after the five hour delay on account of a malted

milk ball, Dean had to post $250 bond before he could enter the notoriously

malted milk ball-friendly nation to the north. Now you know, when that sign

says "no free samples," they're not kidding around.