If heroes get remembered but legends never die, as the great Sandlot once posed, consider Real World: Las Vegas alum Arissa officially immortal. Her epic, vulgar-splattered tell-off on the most recent The Challenge: All Stars episode was NSFW myth-making at its most potent…and we kinda loved it.
After Teck’s elimination, the game’s remaining players were divided into four teams for “On the Ropes,” a race played in two heats of two teams each. At the sound of host TJ Lavin’s horns, players would alternate racing from one platform across a tangled web of ropes to a second platform and back, at which point they could detach one of their opponents’ ropes and send it splashing into the water below.
And while Gold Team Ruthie, Aneesa, Mark, Yes and Derrick proved to have the game down to a science, it was a struggle for the Silver Team: Jemmye, Syrus, Nememiah and Captain Beth, who was automatically sentenced to The Arena for leading the losing team.
“I’m just not having good luck in this game so far,” said Beth, whose forearms were raw with rope burn after The Challenge.
Mark, who earned the power of the Life Saver as part of his team’s win, toyed with the idea of finally activating the relic that had so far been unused by former winners Jisela, Kendal and Nehemiah. Mark said he was determined to save Katie, who eventually nominated herself into The Arena after an unremarkable performance, from the forthcoming elimination round and, instead, send Kendal in her place.
Still, Jemmye, Beth’s unlikely Challenge BFF, insisted that Arissa would be Beth’s best bet for an elimination-round win. Not only did Beth outsize the Battle of the Sexes 2 finalist, Arissa — who’d been separating herself from the rest of the house during social hours — seemed like an easy target.
“Arissa is a very different person than I know from Real World: Las Vegas,” Alton observed of his former housemate. “She was kind of like this hardcore chick. Now Arissa is kind of like a loner actually…that’s probably going to put a flag on you.”
Still, Arissa insisted to Mark that she wanted to play ball.
“I wanna participate in this game,” Arissa eventually reassured Mark. “I don’t like people f***ing with my money. Just because I’m zen doesn’t mean I can’t revert back to that part of me if need be.”
And revert, Arissa surely did.
Mark, who did, indeed, use the Life Saver to save Katie, unexpectedly discovered that it wasn’t he who’d choose her replacement: The house would have to vote once more for Beth’s new opponent. And when Darrell, the first up to bat, struggled to name his nominee, Beth suggested Arissa.
So Darrell complied. And then, so did many of his fellow competitors. And then, Arissa was summoned down to The Arena, but she didn’t make the trip quietly.
“Bitch, you don’t want to see me in this Arena,” Arissa said. “I’ll f***ing send you home.”
Arissa, seething, originally seem poised to take Beth on in “Wall Ball” though insisted to TJ that she’d rather “box her.” But when it was time to compete, Arissa tore off her helmet, turned to face the crowd behind her and delivered a diatribe more fiery than Ayanna after her BOTS2 elimination, more wounded than Rachel after her Battle of the Sexes ousting and more biting than Jo after removing herself from Gauntlet 2.
“I don’t need a helmet -- I’d actually like to address my house right now,” Arissa said. “The way y’all pulled this sh** was some flagrant, snake-ass sh**. And while I respect the way this game is played, what I don’t respect is how y’all is living, which is pretty f***ing foul. And if I can’t box her, I don’t want any part of it.”
“So f*** you, I’m done,” Arissa added as she threw up a middle finger. “Y’all can kiss my motherf***ing ass. And that’s the motherf***ing game.”
That’s the motherf***ing game. May Etsy unveil its new related collection of fine home furnishings by summer.
Check out Arissa’s filthy dismissal in all its fiery glory in the latest episode, and be sure to keep tuning in to The Challenge: All Stars on Paramount+ with new episodes every Thursday.