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Carly Rae Jepsen Lets Bae Down Easy On ‘Let’s Be Friends’

She gives the ‘It’s not you, it’s me’ speech

Oh the venomous lyrics, the cheery disposition, the timing! Carly Rae Jepsen may just be the villain of Valentine's Day with her evil new release, "Let's Be Friends," that offers a roadmap for a bumpy breakup. She brings you in close to experience the moment when she ends a situation that's been spiraling out of control for some time. Holding his beating heart in her well-manicured fingers, she crushes it and sticks her tongue out.

Imagine it's Valentine's Day, and after the 324th silly argument of the year, Jepsen has had it with her partner. So she plays along and sets up a nice dinner and then gets dolled up in a little black dress. Once the future exes get to the restaurant, that's where "Let's Be Friends" comes into play, finding us along the ride for the relationship-ending situation about to unfold.

The beat kicks in like a groovy celebration of love, only we know that the outcome will be more sinister than an electric kiss. A fuzzy guitar gives way to an upbeat rhythm that puts Jepsen's voice front and center to be the bearer of bad news."Nobody's dying, it's a dinner, not a date, but I'm / Feeling young and inspired / That this is over and I'm hoping you'll agree," she whispers between forkfuls of Caesar salad, smiling. Her partner's shocked; he never thought this would happen. Maybe she's just attempting to scare him. She'd never leave him. Then, she drops the bombshell: "That little phrase, 'It isn't you, baby, it's me.'"

Now that the hardest part is out of the way, Jepsen's dinner can go smoothly so she breathes a sigh of relief. She offers this guy a proposition to remain cordial with a slight twist. "Let's be friends that never speak again / It's cool, we can just pretend / We're friends and never speak again / See you soon, hope we can remain good friends," she carols so sweetly on the chorus.

There are tears in the guy's eyes now and he's downing some wine that he got sent to the table, but a little bit of waterworks isn't going to make Jepsen change her mind. As if. She's too busy concentrating on this delicious Chilean sea bass to care, savoring the warmth that she should have been getting from her partner.

She looks up to see him staring off into the distance, wondering where everything went wrong. "I had a really nice time with you / I mean, you're sort of a dick sometimes," she says, sipping on her wine, getting something out of her teeth, and then continuing. "But someone out there is surely gonna love a dick / Uh, check, please." They leave the restaurant a short time later in two vastly different moods; Carly's heading to jump for joy in her jammies while this bad guy's going to sit on the porch and reevaluate how he treats his partners.

"Let's Be Friends" is Jepsen's first new song of 2020. She released her fourth studio album, Dedicated, last year.

Check out the dastardly breakup song "Let's Be Friends" up above.