Thaddaeus McAdams / Contributor / Getty Images

Do Migos Understand How Food Works On Their New Song 'Stir Fry'?

We break down every food reference

Here is a list of things Migos know a lot about: Versace, Disney Channel shows, t-shirts, and women that are both bad and boujee. Unfortunately, missing from that list are the mechanics of cooking, or for that matter, food. Honestly, on their new Pharrell-produced song, "Stir Fry," I'm not sure the Atlanta trio knows how to cook stir fry.

Instead of explaining the intricacies of Pharrell's production, detailing the continued melodic evolution of Quavo, or debating how slept-on Takeoff is, let's do something far more essential — examine every food reference on "Stir Fry." Each lyric is rated on a scale of 1 to 5 stir fry. One stir fry means you've never watched an episode of Chopped in your life, and five assumes you knows not to put a puree on your crispy fish skin.

  • "Trap n---a with the chickens like Popeye's"
    Photo by Joe Raedle/Getty Images

    Rating: 5 out of 5 stir fry

    Drug dealing, chickens, fast food chain... this metaphor checks out.

  • "She got a big ol' onion booty, make the world cry"
    JIM WATSON/AFP/Getty Images

    Rating: 5 out of 5 stir fry

    Certain booties are so gorgeous they do in fact make the world cry. Onions have the same property, but for opposite reasons. So far, Migos' food references are more serious than Tom Colicchio.

  • "In the kitchen, wrist twistin' like it's stir fry"
    Photo by JHU Sheridan Libraries/Gado/Getty Images

    Rating: 3 out of 5 stir fry

    I have a central question about this line. Is Quavo twisting his wrist when he's making stir fry, or is the stir fry anthropomorphic, which gives it wrists that also twist? None of this is clear.

    Also, twisting your wrist in any rigorous activity seems like an ill-advised suggestion. "In the kitchen, wrist 'steady' like a stir fry," would've been a better message for the young fans and their bony wrists.

  • "In that skillet, watch me flip it like it's Five Guys (flip it)"
    Photo by John Greim/LightRocket via Getty Images

    Rating: 4 out of 5 stir fry

    My only problem with this rhyme is the fact that Offset says "in that skillet," instead of "on that skillet." I've been to Five Guys before, and I've never seen them flip a burger in a skillet.

    The devil is in the details, Offset. You have a wedding coming up. Some people are going to want fish and others will demand chicken. Precision in these times is key.

  • "Icy Patek, check, yeah, baguettes, they sit on my neck"
    Photo by SSPL/Getty Images

    Rating: 3 out of 5 stir fry

    Baguettes are a type of bread. Bread symbolically stands for money in hip-hop vernacular. Baguettes are also long, so I'm assuming Offset is telling fans his money is of considerable length.

    So here are my issues with the line. First, the baguettes aren't sitting on your neck. The jewelry that you buy with said french bread is on your neck. Second, while one's money being long is admirable, what if rappers started comparing their cash to challah? The intricately braided bread could be a symbol for how well you diversify your bonds. Word to Wu-Tang Financial.

  • "In the kitchen, curry chicken, call it stir fry"
    Photo by DeAgostini/Getty Images

    Rating: 1 out of 5 stir fry

    The only thing wrong with this line is the fact that Takeoff was probably eating curry chicken stir fry in the studio, pointed to the meal, and made a rap about it. Takeoff gave us the first verse on the legendary "T-Shirt." I want more from the heart and soul of Migos.

  • "Pockets, blue cheese, I'm in the kitchen"
    Photo by Culture Club/Getty Images

    Rating: 5 out of 5 stir fry

    This list is getting exhausting. Also, leaving cheese in your pocket seems like a horrible way to store dairy products.