They tried to make them go to rehab and they said yes, yes, yes.
Paige and Jordan entered a facility called Becomings on tonight's Mary + Jane but not because they were struggling with addiction: When the two made a pot delivery there and were mistaken for patients, they decided to play along because the place was so damn luxe.
So what, exactly, did Becomings have to offer? Here are the top seven amenities that enticed Paige and Jordan -- and made rehab look like the new destination hotspot:
Heaven on Earth: every single room had central air.
Because who doesn’t love dessert?
More Ice Cream
Because who doesn’t love a second serving of dessert?
The Vaginal Steam Room
Tbh, we can't figure it out either.
Fact: There's nothing on Earth better than free spa treatments.
Wait -- they are free, aren’t they?
Well, no: The spa bill came to $5,000, and the "standard rehab fee" turned out to be $30K. Good thing Jordan's and Paige's feet had just gotten a tune-up -- so they could run. like. hell.
Have you ever skipped out on a bill like Paige and Jordan did? Confess your sins, then catch another episode of Mary + Jane on Monday at 10/9c!