No Joke, James Lipton was a Parisian P.I.M.P.

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You might know James Lipton as the self-effacing and still oh-so-esteemed host of Bravo's "Inside the Actor's Studio," but if you are a female alum of, say, post-WWII Paris, you might just know him as your former paramour procurer.

Okay so that was just a longer way of saying James Lipton was a pimp. And no, that is not a joke.

In a new interview with Parade Magazine which, well, pimps the upcoming 250th episode of "Inside," Lipton came clean about his pre-glory days as a sexy-time coordinator.

"I was," he admitted to his former fancy man status. "It was only a few years after the war. Paris was different then, still poor. Men couldn't get jobs and, in the male chauvinist Paris of that time, the women couldn't get work at all. It was perfectly respectable for them to go into le milieu."

"Young women desperately needed money for various reasons," he said in defense of his booty trade entanglement. "They were beautiful and young and extraordinary. There was no opprobrium because it was completely regulated. Every week they had to be inspected medically. The great bordellos were still flourishing in those days before the sheriff of Paris, a woman, closed them down. It was a different time."

Boy, it's pretty much like he pulled one of these guys and just blew our friggin' minds.

What's more, Lipton may have gotten his start in the makin' whoopee cash machine with just one lady friend who wanted to help him stick around the City of Lights a bit longer than his wallet would've otherwise allowed, but he was so flippin' good at the job that he wound up repping "a whole bordello."

Yes, that lingo and everything.

"I did a roaring business, and I was able to live for a year," he boasted. "The French mecs didn’t exploit women. They represented them, like agents. And they took a cut. That’s how I lived. I was going through my rites of passage, no question about it. It was a great year of my life."

Just call him Liptonnns 'o Fun from now on, got it?

Oh, but wait. Here's the thing. Now that he's a prestigious talk show host who asks things like ...

... he's no longer down with "the industry," so to speak.

"I think if you can't earn it on your own, then you don't deserve it," he said of modern sex. How incredibly scrumtulescent of him ... although he did say "earn," which in and of itself screams a financial angle, no?

We're so confused! This is definitely gonna takes some time — and a lotta repeating Matt Damon's favorite curse word — to get over.