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Biopics about U.S. presidents usually depict Commanders in Chief as stately, diplomatic heads of state whose biggest fights are with Congress or rascally foreign countries.
The new movie "Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter," however, gives us an Abraham Lincoln we've never read about in history books. Freeing the slaves was a pretty kickass thing to do in real life, but in Timur Bekmambetov's adaptation of Seth Grahame-Smith's novel, our 16th president speaks softly, carries a big ax, and chops up vampires 'til they're deader than undead.
All those other presidents must be kind of jealous of Honest Abe right about now, don't you think? So with the help of Old Red Jalopy, we're casting even more of our nation's leaders as action hero-types, striking down more than just bad legislation. You're welcome, POTUSes.