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Theater owners will have to add extra padding to their multiplex walls to absorb all the geeking out that's gonna happen when "The Avengers" finally assemble on May 4.
Director Joss Whedon, who singlehandedly orchestrated the Buffyverse, now has the whole Marvel Universe at his fingertips for one knock-down, drag-out comic book smorgasbord including Iron Man (Robert Downey Jr.), Captain America (Chris Evans), Thor (Chris Hemsworth), The Hulk (Mark Ruffalo), Black Widow (Scarlett Johansson), Hawkeye (Jeremy Renner), and Nick Fury (Samuel L. Jackson) all fighting off a certain God of Mischief named Loki (Tom Hiddleston) and his army of Chitauri.
1. Black Widow gives these bad guys a little tae kwon ScarJo.
2. Laser beams? Please. Captain America eats laser beams to the gut for breakfast.
3. It's Iron Man taking on Thor, mano-a-mano ... or is that mano-a-GODo?
4. Casually inserting the title of the movie into dialogue is no small feat, but twice in one scene? We salute you, Mr. Stark.
5. Loki may have mystical powers, but between him and Nick Fury, only one of these fellas has a wallet with "Bad Mother F**ker" on it.