James Franco Reviews 'Breaking Dawn' ... Really

[caption id="attachment_59303" align="alignleft" width="220" caption="Getty Images"]James Franco[/caption]

In his dual review of both "The Descendants" and "The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn Part 1," actor/writer/director/teacher/performance artist/painter/poet/provocateur/Gucci spokesman/Wizard of Oz/journalist James Franco is trying to make a point.

He's taking two films on diametrically opposite ends of both the critical and cultural radar and attempting to say that they basically contain the same values. "WHAAAAAA?" you might say, and you wouldn't be half wrong, but after reading through the piece in The Paris Review you might come away with a different perspective on things.

Besides using "sex as a submerged theme" and trying "to devalue motherhood" (damn you, movie patriarchy!), the "Rise of the Planet of the Apes" star claims both films use financially well-off protagonists who are unrelatable to the common Joe sixpack/the plumber and glorify their fortunate existence.

"Bella initially fares little better; despite the boys' best efforts, she dies in childbirth," Franco writes. "But not to worry! She can be saved by being turned into a vampire, a recourse not available to most teen moms. But then again, those 'Twilight' creators know how to get their blood—and eat it, too."

Wait, is he saying "Twilight" isn't realistic? Decide for yourself by reading the whole piece here.

Check out our Robert Pattinson Touches His Hair gallery: